Dysfunction Junkies
COMING NOVEMBER 20, 2024!!! Two high school besties reconnect and commiserate their stories as they navigate the dysfunctions of life from marriage, families, illness, death of childhood families, and creating healthy boundaries. Join them each week as Chrisy and Kerry share their stories and life lessons all with a zest of wit, humor, and love. They may not have seen it all, but they have seen enough!
Dysfunction Junkies
The Most Dysfunctional Time of the Year....the Holidays!
The Holidays are coming. Remember the thrill of picking out Halloween costumes as a kid? Picture this: a pirate costume complete with a homemade peg leg that turned trick-or-treating into an unexpected comedy routine. If you love the nostalgia of Halloween and the chaos of family holidays, you'll want to join us for some laugh-out-loud nostalgia. Chrisy and Kerry take you on a journey through Halloween memories, from the iconic Ben Cooper costumes and department store selections to the sheer joy of watching Halloween specials like "The Great Pumpkin" and the lesser-known "The Halloween That Almost Wasn't."
The laughs come easy as the duo reminisce about the early days of Halloween decor and the quirky transformations they undergo. Whether you're a fan of the towering skeletons or prefer a more traditional touch, this episode captures the evolution of how we celebrate the spooky season.
Shifting gears to Thanksgiving, Chrisy and Kerry dish out the hilarity and dysfunction of family gatherings. Imagine ditching the chaos for a peaceful Tennessee getaway or simply opting for a buffet-style feast to keep things chill. With humorous insights into family drinking habits, from Mogen David wine to Carlo Rossi's famous jugs, we explore the unspoken norms that make Thanksgiving both a challenge and a joy. Join us for a fun-filled conversation that blends personal stories with relatable humor, offering a fresh perspective on navigating the holiday season's quirks and traditions.
Thank you for listening. Be sure to check out our Facebook and Instagram pages for additional content. We often post polls and other questions for your feedback. We would love to hear from you, and if you like our show please take a moment to give us a Five Star Review!
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Dysfunction Junkies has all rights to the songs "Hit the Ground Running" created by Ryan Prewett and "Happy Hour" created by Evert Z.
Welcome to the Dysfunction Junkies podcast. We may not have seen it all, but we've seen enough. And now here are your hosts, Chrisy and Kerry.
Kerry:Hi everybody, welcome Dysfunction Junkies and welcome to your safe space. I'm Kerry and I'm Chrisy, so today we are going to talk about, in light of the recent past, Halloween and upcoming Thanksgiving holidays. We're going to talk about the creme de la creme of family dysfunction the best time of the year the holidays.
Chrisy:The lovely holiday season is upon us, that's right.
Kerry:So, Chrisy, where should we even start?
Chrisy:Oh, we're going to start with my favorite one, which is Halloween. It should be the only holiday out there. It's perfect.
Kerry:Not a fan, just not a fan. Why do you like Halloween so much?
Chrisy:Well, probably first of all, didn't really understand why you would like it the most out of the holidays and I say that because it's great while it's happening but I am a lover of Christmas and Thanksgiving. I do like holidays, even though most of them have been disasters for me in the past, and a lot of people. But because you don't really have any pressure of family for Halloween.
Kerry:That is a great point. I never thought about that. Maybe I need to reconsider my thoughts on Halloween, probably.
Chrisy:And maybe some people didn't get into Halloween. Maybe family and stuff doesn't really promote Halloween because it is not one of those holidays you could really muck up with family traditions. Yeah, I mean, this is true, it's a tough one.
Kerry:It is. Yeah, we did not celebrate Halloween in my house. I think part of it was because we lived out in the country and you know, like I've mentioned before, there was two cemeteries and then there was like two older people. There wasn't really kids, so there was nothing to enjoy, there was no neighborhood community, there was no trick or treating. So you know, we just didn't celebrate it.
Chrisy:I don't know you said you're by the two cemeteries. I think you're actually was in. That was an ideal spot for party time for me.
Kerry:But that could have been. That could have been, but, you know, it was like that was Halloween all year round, though for us, because you lived on the house or the street with two cemeteries.
Chrisy:You're always staring at the cemetery. I gotcha.
Kerry:Right, exactly, and we kind of grew up with a ghost in the house, so you know the whole like ooh, ghost, scary. Well, that was common, that was every day for me.
Chrisy:So every day was Halloween, I guess. Yeah, you're definitely, that is going to be definitely your story to tell. I will sit here and be a good listener.
Kerry:Maybe another episode will save that one.
Chrisy:Yes, some people will be rolling their eyes at that, because I have had some experiences myself, but we have some disbelievers in the room. And since there's only one other person. They know who they are.
Kerry:Yes, DJ Nick, total disbeliever. So did your family decorate for Halloween?
Chrisy:Yes, Back a long time ago, when I was real little, we had those traditional Halloween decorations, those 1970s, 1960s, 70s, the ones you just tape up on your windows the cats, the crazy. They're so retro, they're great, yes in fact you, I think you can still buy them. I think I've tried to score them in the past and I and I probably need to get some new ones, because they just really scream my childhood, yeah um, we didn't decorate hardly at all.
Kerry:If we did any kind of decorating, it was the fall decorating. So you might have seen a pumpkin on our porch, you might have seen a corn stalk, you know that kind of fall thing that somewhat carries over with Halloween, but nothing in the fact of like no ghost in the yard or no spider webs anywhere or no stickums on the windows, none of that.
Chrisy:No, well, some people get really, really out there. I, as an adult, I got more crazy.
Kerry:Okay.
Chrisy:Now we just pretty much stuck with those things. On the windows Right A pumpkin was carved. That's pretty much it. Now, when I was a little bit older sort of getting out of grade school into junior high my dad would decorate a little bit more. He happened to take back when we used to get those great happy meals with the pumpkin and the ghost and all that my father created.
Chrisy:He basically destroyed these some of them, which is kind of a bummer now, but stuck a hole in them, created these things, turned them into lights by stringing lights through them and he used to put on our front bay window where I lived. It looked like a pumpkin face oh my god, it was actually pretty cool because the two happy meal things were the eyes oh my gosh.
Chrisy:And then he had a string of like pumpkin lights that were the mouth. So it looked very cool, right, but it's kind of heartbreaking now to think that he put a hole in those happy meal buckets and basically useless. I do, I did salvage some that are not tampered with, but but that also means you got to eat a lot of mcdonald's and happy meals.
Kerry:Oh boy, did I oh yeah, see, that was a and it showed a lot times too that was a privilege in our house. That was like a it's your birthday, you get to decide where you want to go out to eat, and that was it was usually mcdonald's was the price range, so like mcdonald's was like a once a year thing for us oh my god, I know I can't even.
Chrisy:No, it's just like I. I only got the orange and the white pumpkins. I need the other color. I mean, how many I gotta keep going to get? Yeah, there was no control over that in my house. Oh, my god didn't want to get my father's order wrong, because then you had to do that. That's a whole other episode. When you got dad's fast food order wrong, oh, no, stay tuned for that.
Kerry:There you go. So did you go trick or treating?
Chrisy:Absolutely.
Kerry:Oh my gosh. Yes, I did not go trick or treating until I was probably in seventh grade. Oh my God. Probably in seventh grade. Oh my god, I know well. No, come on, I'm not kidding you, I'm serious again, what am I going to do? Go to the graveyard, knock?
Chrisy:knock, knock, trick or treat to the grave, come on well, these days people they take their kids to. You know, we saw this a lot uh later on growing up. Uh, because some neighborhoods right weren't safe, yes, or at least the families didn't think they felt safe there. So a lot of times you would have families that Truck them to the good neighborhoods.
Kerry:They would With the better candy.
Chrisy:And when I was younger I would get hostile about this, like who the heck is this? You know, I don't know who these people are. But you get older and then you have kids of your own and you realize you know you really just want your kids to have a good experience and you want them to be safe, Right.
Kerry:Well, that is why I didn't go trick-or-treating until seventh or eighth grade because, again, didn't have a neighborhood, didn't celebrate Halloween. But when I was in, you know, seventh and eighth grade, I had a friend who lived in a real neighborhood and so I got to go over her house and go trick-or-treating with her and spend the night at her house. So I was one of those kids who infiltrated your neighborhood because we didn't have a neighbor but you were grandfathered and you came with a oh, I was grandfathered because you were resident.
Chrisy:You were with a resident, you were with somebody.
Kerry:Yeah, I mean, that's, that's allowed I had a pass, you had a pass.
Chrisy:Yes, so, but uh oh yeah, there's, a whole thing. We live in a neighborhood that has a specific Halloween time, which is established sort of by the families here and then it's given out to the families through our HOA and we're pretty much strict here. Yeah, that and this is a different animal where I live now compared to where I was um that it's just for neighborhood.
Kerry:Oh, our neighborhood, kids and grandchildren do they shut the street down and have someone monitoring the streets?
Chrisy:no, oh okay, but if you give out that information about when our trick-or-treat times, are you can be tried and I bet hung.
Kerry:Burned at the stake.
Chrisy:Yes, so don't you dare give out that top secret information? Because now, where I grew up, and where you grew up too, you had established trick or treat times depending on what side of town you were on and you were outside of the city of Youngstown. So you probably maybe would have had a different time. Yeah, we probably did. Youngstown had its own. Probably maybe would have had a different time.
Kerry:Yeah, we probably did.
Chrisy:Youngstown had its own time, and what's funny is you can sort of you know what neighborhoods if you look back at that now are safe and which ones aren't.
Kerry:By what time?
Chrisy:Yeah, because I think in the city of Youngstown now you have to trick or treat on Sunday between 1030 am and right after lunch and then you have to. You're done, yeah, but then you'd like look at somewhere like where you were in.
Kerry:Austin town or Boardman, 7 pm to 9.
Chrisy:Oh, camfield, I bet you can trick or treat there all day until midnight. Exactly those lucky people over there, you lucky assholes getting all the candy. What was your favorite Halloween costume. I think I dressed up as like a vampire quite a few times. I am a big fan of, and our generation knows this, although you didn't participate as much, so maybe you don't.
Chrisy:They were called. They're the costumes you would have got at Woolworth or the drugstores. I actually know the name of these things because of the guy who sort of is the artist behind the whole idea of it ben cooper. Okay, costumes which were those hideous, the mad hard masks with the teeny tiny hole for your mouth and the little pinholes for your eyes and, um, then the basically it was a garbage, an elaborate garbage bag, yes, with a design on it ben cooper.
Chrisy:Yes, and I have a t-shirt which I should have worn, but it has the Ben Cooper faces on it. I'll have to wear it. Maybe we'll post it, so people can see.
Kerry:That would be great.
Chrisy:It has the most famous Ben Cooper mask Nowadays. You look at this and you have to say this is beautiful artwork. If you're a fan of that kind of pulp kind of type thing, it's really a unique type of thing. It's really a unique type of thing and they're kind of cool to click. They came in these perfect little boxes.
Kerry:Yes.
Chrisy:Where the mask was right in the little window.
Kerry:Yeah, they're scary.
Chrisy:Oh my God, they were so exciting when you go and they had them all lined up in the store.
Kerry:Hills Department Store Hills yeah, woolworths, kmart.
Chrisy:What's so funny is they have a commercial that floats around on YouTube advertising for those costumes at Halloween time and getting all your candy at Woolworths. And then they hold up this LP, a record album. They said this is like a buck 79 with your purchase. I still have that album.
Kerry:You do not.
Chrisy:Yes, it's a spooky Halloween album and again, the artwork on these albums is fantastic.
Kerry:Oh my gosh, If you like that kind of stuff.
Chrisy:So well, now you never.
Kerry:But when you did finally trick or treat, yes, do you remember what you dressed up as the very first one? I remember is when, the very first time I went to my friend's house, I was going to be a pirate and because I had no concept of what this trick or treating and what physical, physical labor involved, I thought it would be great to have a peg leg. And so I got my jeans on and I had my leg like folded, like you know, bent so in my jeans so that it ended at the knee. And then my dad cut off like a piece of wood or whatever and we tied it to the bottom. So I was literally hopping around on one leg because I was a peg leg.
Kerry:And so I get to my friend's house, all excited like ha ha, look at this great costume. And the mom and dad my friend's mom and dad looked at me in total horror, like how are you going to trick or treat? And I'm like, well, I hopped here, like you know, from the car and I'm like it was no problem, I could do it. And they literally went and got crutches for me. They're like, yeah, you're not gonna make it. Oh, my gosh, that's how naive I was. And, um, yeah, let's just say I think by three houses. I went back and, like I took, I pulled my leg out of the jean and we had to, like, start all over.
Chrisy:so yeah, I'm guessing they were looking at you, especially your friend. Yes, probably was looking at you and thought now she's become a liability, because how am I supposed to run from? The whole idea of Halloween is just getting from house to house quickly to get more and more of that junk in your bag.
Kerry:I just never forget the look on the parents face.
Chrisy:They were just like oh well, hey, that's amazing, but your heart was in it.
Kerry:Yeah, it was, yeah, it was. So how do you think that Halloween is dysfunctional, going with our theme of our podcast here?
Chrisy:Well, I think I'm sure there was always some level of dysfunction with it, but now the whole idea of having to think about it yeah, so early.
Kerry:Yeah.
Chrisy:Is blows my mind, and people are trying to.
Kerry:you know look when I was little.
Chrisy:Getting excited about something you knew was going to be coming up was fun.
Kerry:Yeah, but I'm talking, you know little.
Chrisy:Yeah, you know you're a kid Right, and I think it's so desensitizing when you go to a store in July or August even, yes and you see pumpkins and I know they really push all this on social media and how fun it is and people make these fun videos about how soon as Independence Day is over yeah, I'm getting my pumpkins out you know, and I feel like it sort of just takes away from that, I know Because it's such a long build up.
Kerry:Yeah, but for what?
Chrisy:To me there's.
Kerry:I mean I like the build up to.
Chrisy:Christmas but for Halloween. Like well, there are a lot of movies to get in in that time period and if you like movies, halloween theme type stuff, you need to start watching them, unless you just don't have a life at all and that's all you have to do.
Kerry:Yeah.
Chrisy:We could talk about scary movies.
Kerry:Yes, we've talked a little bit about this. You introduced me to my very first scary movie.
Chrisy:Oh, I don't remember I know, you remember everything. I know, but for some reason I must have just did my damage and moved on.
Kerry:Yeah, you damaged me, that's for sure. So I was always terrified of, you know, like scary things. You know, I just didn't like. I didn't like scary movies. But I remember, like our sophomore year no, it was probably our junior year, because we met in sophomore year, so Halloween was probably already passed it was probably our junior year that you got me to watch Children of the Corn and I think I watched most of the movie with, like, looking between my fingers, um, and I'm just terrified, terrified.
Chrisy:I don't even know if I got through the whole movie, so well, I'm surprised I started with that one because generally my go-to for traumatizing and I have a friend who I grew up with, uh, in my neighborhood. If she's listening she knows I'm talking about her right now. It was the Exorcist. That was always my intro to let me see if I can get it so you can't sleep for a while and sit here and giggle at you while you squirm watching this stuff.
Kerry:Yeah, and see, I think the reason why I finally got you not to watch that one with or make me watch that one, it was just a little bit too close to home because we had a ghost in our house and being very catholic like that was just like taboo I don't think I just did how.
Chrisy:If you're catholic, that's taboo. It's got a priest in it, it's got two priests in it. I don't know. It's perfect for the catholics. Everybody run out from the catholic church and go, if you haven't seen it.
Kerry:Shame on you. I don't know, in fact. In fact, honestly, I can't, ever, I can't say that I've watched that movie and it's entirely even to this day. I've seen pieces of it.
Chrisy:You know what I was really upset about? I don't know who cleaned up the floor after the little girl peed on it. It wasn't like the fact that she was like completely possessed by the devil was like completely possessed by the devil. I'm like man. This woman was having a party and this little girl came down and ruined the whole thing because she urinated all over the carpet.
Kerry:Somebody's gonna clean that up right, somebody's gotta clean it up, yeah, and get back to the party and get her back in her room.
Chrisy:She's obviously a real downer for this event oh my gosh, that's so funny.
Kerry:Yeah, yeah. So I'm just not a halloween fan. Just the more we talk about, the more I'm like yep, nope, can't do it well, and the decorations. I'm. I just have to get back to that because the decorations they just like. Right now people are just feeling. Well, like you know, we're seeing the yards. You know people are starting to take things down because halloween's passed, but um, but still some of them keep them up all year round.
Chrisy:But then you got those inflatables oh boy, here we go, oh god what inflatables yeah I never understood inflatables. They weren't always around.
Kerry:No, that was a new thing back in the.
Chrisy:I don't remember them being a thing, uh, when I was real little, which would have been in the 70s or when I was a young into the 80s. I feel like they came around in early 90s. Must have been in the 70s or when I was a young into the 80s I feel like they came around in early 90s.
Chrisy:Must have been in the 90s somewhere and look, it's a great concept and they do, and you get a way, uh, better representation of things with these lovely, uh wannabe, macy's day parade inflatables. But you put them in your yard. Um, but I didn't understand the concept of them when they first came out and I would see them and they started popping up literally and I would drive past and I would be like, oh my God, there's like this big Halloween balloon of some sort in their yard and I would drive by and be like, ok, you know, it's lit up, it's night, it looks nice. And then the next morning I go out and I see the remnants of it laying on the ground, completely deflated.
Chrisy:Yeah, and maybe this is a Youngstown thing, but I thought right away the first thing that came to mind was somebody drove by and shot these damn things down. Oh my gosh, I said, why are they not pumped? Somebody shot them. I guess that'll tell you Don't put balloons in your yard. Someone's going to come by and just peg the damn thing's up and smiling like an ass and waving at you, and I'd be like, holy shit, they pumped it back up. They must've gotten a nice little patch on that damn thing and, chrissy, you did not.
Chrisy:I didn't realize that you had to deflate them. I thought they just stayed pumped up until you took the shitty things down. So, and then I next night, the next morning, I drive by and they're down again. I'm like God damn it, somebody. Really, they're dedicated. They don't want that shit in your yard. Quit blowing that shit back up. Somebody keeps shooting. You better watch, because it's not going to just be that that's going to get shot. You're going to be walking around. Someone's going to nail you with a flipping bullet too. Stop blowing these stupid things up.
Kerry:Oh, my God, Chrisy, how long did it take you before you realized that?
Chrisy:Probably about five or six times driving by. Oh my.
Kerry:God, you're too much. But the sad thing is, I can totally understand why you thought that, given the general vicinity of where we live and things that happen here.
Chrisy:Oh yeah, as soon as you see something laying in a yard that doesn't look well, you figured something got shot. Something got shot. You think somebody noticed I don't know.
Kerry:Oh my gosh. Yeah, I'm definitely not a fan of the inflatables. Like I think when it first started and they had like one, it was like oh, that's kind of cool. But now, like, even getting into the Christmas holidays, you know where people, you know they had all the decorations, you know. But now you'll go drive by a house that has like I'm not kidding you, there's two houses that, I swear to God, have 50 or 60 of these inflatables, one after another, and I'm like, okay, now, that's just lazy. You know, if you're going to go out, do you know Chevy Chase National Lampoon's decorating?
Kerry:I agree I agree, but I'm sure we'll talk about Christmas more closer to the season. But yeah, the inflatables at Halloween you know like, or those really big, like 15-foot-tall skeletons, really.
Chrisy:And then they leave them up all year round.
Kerry:Well, no, and they put a Santa Claus hat on the skeleton.
Chrisy:Really. And then they leave them up all year round and they put a Santa Claus hat on the skeleton Really? They're very devoted to their specific holiday, I guess that's their holiday soul. There's Halloween and they're going to go with it. I don't understand buying a black Christmas tree and putting orange lights on it and sticking the night before. Whatever that Tim Burton movie is. I know I'm a movie person, but I didn't actually sit through twice a night before christmas. I'm sorry, I like the other stuff.
Kerry:I just haven't sat through that yet I guess I should say, though, too, is you know, this is just our personal experiences, these are our thoughts, these are our feelings, and for those of you that you know are avid halloween decorators, and everything and and you love your little Halloween inflatables Wonderful, there's an industry for that Right Keeping people.
Chrisy:I don't know exactly what type of people you're keeping in business, but you're keeping people working and I am an advocate of you.
Kerry:do you? Yes, yes, so, absolutely so, hey, you do you? You keep going. I'm just saying for me I don't get it, but I respect the dedication that people have to me and they are dedicated.
Chrisy:And probably the only way you can scare me is if you sneak to where I live and you put up an inflatable in my yard and I wake up and there's this crazy balloon staring at me.
Kerry:Oh my gosh.
Chrisy:That would be terrifying to me. Nothing else, not the exorcist, except maybe the little girl peeing on the floor. But yeah, so and Halloween. When you think about it, it is like a totally dysfunctional idea, though. Yeah, first of all, it's based on dead Right Death. You know they say oh, it's about people that one night of the year that the dead people can come back, right. Whoever started that rumor? Not exactly sure about that.
Kerry:Somebody obviously wanted people to stay home, um, and then they love their family so much they actually wanted them to come back.
Chrisy:You know, I don't know that I don't know that would be interesting and, uh, you get used up with something else. Yeah, so you get to pretend which is okay, wonderful, and you go and you beg for stuff at people's houses and sometimes you say horrible things about smelling feet and stuff.
Kerry:I never understood that trick or treat smell my feet, give me something good to eat.
Chrisy:Yeah, I'm not exactly sure you want to do that these days. You might get something you're not bargaining. This is true. Careful kids, yes, um, but uh no I'm a big fan of halloween. I do love halloween. I like Halloween decorating. I like the Halloween Not so much. As I've gotten older, I'm not into the scary movies. I've not seen all these new finagle. Oh yeah, saw Never saw. I never saw a saw, never saw a saw, never saw it. Just because as you get older, at least for me, it's just a little too.
Kerry:life becomes scary in itself yep, that is a really, and I don't need something to try and scare me.
Chrisy:I'm terrified.
Kerry:I can do it on my own yes, I get scared going through the car wash, I mean, and that'll be a whole nother episode. But yeah, I don't.
Chrisy:I don't need to put visuals in my head on the watching a movie, no right but uh, my favorite thing though, uh, if you really, uh, I think people are aging, and if you're younger and you enjoy this too, the cartoon Halloween stuff. I love the pumpkin that couldn't smile with Raggedy Ann and Andy I love it. It's hilarious. My husband, who I don't think watched any of these things too much growing up. Of course he saw the Great Pumpkin with.
Kerry:Charlie Brown the.
Chrisy:Garfield Halloween special was big once we were kind of in junior high, but still that's a classic. Much growing up, I mean, of course he saw the great pumpkin with charlie brown. The garfield halloween special was big once we were kind of in junior high, but still that's a classic. Um, there's a casper halloween out there that used to run. There's this one that only I kind of know about other people probably know about it.
Chrisy:But when I had my husband watch it he was like completely upset that I wasted 22 minutes of his time watching this 22 minutes of his life.
Kerry:I think it was 22, because I think that's what a show usually runs. If you have, what is this?
Chrisy:it's called the halloween. That almost wasn't, and anybody out there who knows what that is. I love you to death because this is one of them weird things. You got to pull it up on YouTube. Judd Hirsch from Taxi plays.
Chrisy:Dracula and you got all these people from the 70s dressing up as monsters. The one guy from Laugh-In is in it. Marriott Hartley is the witch and it's basically. The witch is basically sick of Dracula getting all the press and she doesn't understand why he's like in charge of all the monsters I'll have to watch this and she threatens to basically quit. Oh, and Halloween can only start if she flies over the moon on Halloween night.
Chrisy:Oh, so now Transylvania, which is full of a bunch of Americans, which is weird, but all these American kids dressing up for Halloween in Transylvania are upset because the witch is threatening to quit and there's not going to be a Halloween without her. Oh no, what are we going to do? So now Dracula's got crunch time. He's going to have to figure out what to do with this dumb bitch who's gonna cancel flipping halloween on him. So he's, you know, going crazy trying to figure that out. He basically has to meet some of her demands and it ends with an awesome disco party at the end all right, this is before the dawn of 1980, people.
Kerry:All right. Well, my homework tonight is going to be to find that on YouTube. Yes, yes.
Chrisy:My husband especially finds it very funny when Judd Hirsch is a bat and then he runs into the crypt door and turns into a vampire again and makes a stupid sound.
Kerry:Look for that people. It makes a stupid sound. Look for that people. So, as we put halloween behind us, now we're going to get into the real family time of the year.
Chrisy:Yes, the start of everyone's nightmare exactly thanksgiving.
Kerry:Oh my gosh, I don't even know where to begin my anxiety.
Chrisy:Just even saying that word, my anxiety just went to like level eight, like my chest got tight, like how many people at that day, oh my God, look at the bird on the table and think that that's the luckiest. That dead carcass in the middle of your table is the one that got lucky that day.
Kerry:I'm never gonna look at things oh, my god, you caught me off guard on that one. But that's so true, anybody having ham that day. You know, we've never did ham in my house. No, we didn't every, not for that every major holiday was turkey thanksgiving, christmas, easter, always thanks, always turkey wait a minute easter oh yeah, easter was yep easter too.
Kerry:And now like, so now that I'm, you know, married and my husband, he's always like he loves ham and he's like, do we ever get ham? No, so I'm only now recently. In the past, you know, 15, 20 years, I've started to introduce ham on these holidays because of him, because growing up it was turkey that's well, my husband would love that, because he actually prefers turkey we only used to do turkey for thanks, and then you never saw it again.
Chrisy:And then we had ham generally for the other stuff and of course Italian dishes which we can get into later on too.
Kerry:But I wonder if it had to do something with the cost of it. Like is turkey cheaper than ham? Maybe that was why we didn't do it that way. Well, that, and because of the size of the family, you know, like yeah, you had a way.
Kerry:We had. I mean there literally were times we probably had 30 people, like the dining room table would extend all the way out into the living room, form an L shape to go into the living room, and it was just like and then somewhere the kids table was shoved somewhere. I mean, we had so many people, it was oh my god, no, I'm anxiety, I need to go take a flashback.
Chrisy:I know I'm having ptsd ours was not that big, yeah, um and again we could touch on this. But you brought up the kids table. Yeah, and I'm having a flashback because I was basically the youngest out of everybody there was a point where and the kids table was still something that was respected really had to be a certain age to graduate to an adult table, and I was the last one at that, kid so table?
Kerry:Oh crazy, that's because we were the youngest, yeah.
Chrisy:I sat there by myself and you don't think you could squeeze one more. I'm only five, or whatever I could squeeze in, I'm small. They made you sit by yourself. I had to sit that damn thing by myself. That's horrible. You know what?
Kerry:Why even have another table, Considering the people at the adult table? I you know what? Why even have another table Considering the people at the adult table.
Chrisy:I was like you and the turkey were probably the lucky ones. This was the best table in the house, assholes, Thank you. I'd rather sit here instead of sitting with you. So yeah, and then maybe somebody tossed me some damn food, cause you know there was no food on the kids table. You had to have somebody prep your plate for you.
Chrisy:But for you. But yeah, you had to um, and I never really got the experience of sitting at the adult table with my grandparents, because I was still pretty young by the time like my grandparents started kicking off right, so yeah by then it was just like we're not having grandparent and cousin dinners anymore, it's just immediate family yeah we still.
Kerry:I mean, yeah, my grandparents pretty much passed away when I was younger too, so but we still always had so many. Well, that, because my sisters were so much older that they were already procreating, and so you know there was their kids, and then you just, mom, would bring in the local priest. They'd come in, you know, because what, yeah, yeah, like if the priest didn't have anywhere to go for thanksgiving, it would be not uncommon that the local priest and brothers you know from the monastery would come and have thanksgiving with us or whatever strays you know, like you know people.
Kerry:Strays that you know were around town and didn't you know? They would run into like oh, you have nowhere to go for thanksgiving come to our house, so oh my gosh, that was exciting, wow.
Chrisy:No, ours was closed session, even though the people who were involved in it maybe didn't want to be there, but it was closed. Yeah, no extra. Wow, you guys are really nice people. I can't believe that.
Kerry:Priests, but so much Okay, nice people, I can't believe that. Priests, but so much okay. But then, on the dark side of it, there was so much trauma and abuse that happened during these times of year and it was like the more people that were there, like it was like you would think that things couldn't happen because there were so many people there, but it was like everyone again elephant in the room. We don't talk about things, we'll look at things, whatever. So I just have a lot of anxiety about the holidays, about being around people, that many people. It's why today that I like to have nobody around on the holidays. I want it to just be me and my husband. We often will find excuses to go on vacation during the holidays or have a Friendsgiving holiday, like because of the anxiety. I can't handle it, it's too much. Well, ptsd.
Chrisy:I moving, moving out of town I'm not that far, but I'm far enough, yeah, and just getting older and things happening for a long time. Now, my husband and I and my kids, we've pretty much just done the major holidays together. Friendsgiving sounds wonderful, it's so good. But in general, outside of me and you being able to connect again friends aren't anything I'm that interested in generally, anything I'm that interested in generally. I like people very much, but never enough to really partake in a holiday. Yeah, that seems amazing to me.
Kerry:And I envy that and I think it's maybe, maybe we should do that, we should try it.
Chrisy:It would be fun we could do that, it would be fun, but yeah, so I, I, I I'm sorry for that, but I understand. But yeah, so I'm sorry for that, but I understand, and I do envy anybody who can do the vacation thing during the holidays, because it's probably it's nice. You're going to be stressed out, doing the holidays and staying home. You might as well be stressed out and travel, because at least you're going somewhere nice, exactly so it makes total sense.
Kerry:The one time we drove to Tennessee on Thanksgiving and it purely was to get away from my family, so we went to Tennessee to visit my husband's sister and I don't know it was like a nine hour drive or something. It was like the worst drive. It was the most desolate kind of. It was like are we ever going to get there. But it was still worth it because once we got there, you know his sister's was just like four or five of us, you know. There it was real nice, it was quiet, it was exactly what I wanted. But the drive there was so bad but I was like I'd still rather do that drive than be in the normal holiday thanksgiving. Oh yes, it's too much, I can't. And the food I just like. Everything revolves around the food, the food.
Chrisy:Like so much, I do love food and I can understand. I can appreciate a holiday that worships the food and not anything else. It's not, you know, a baby or any of that other stuff, but the food worshipping.
Kerry:Well. But here's what I didn't like about it was my mom insisted that the food had to be on the table, so she would like it was. We had to, like everyone pass. Well, when you've got 30 people around the table, by the time you pass every here's the corn, here's the mushrooms, here's the turkey by the time you get everything, it's all freaking ice cold.
Chrisy:You ain't eating hot food. Some of the plates probably came past you empty by then, exactly Depending on where you sat.
Kerry:Exactly so. We would always say Mom, can we just do buffet style?
Chrisy:Like that way people could, it would be quicker.
Kerry:Oh no, no, even to this, because they wanted to make it look good that terrible, goddamn picture.
Chrisy:That painting that guy did gives all these people this false idea. And who the hell comes to the table with a whole goddamn turkey intact? I know why we never did. We butchered the shit out of it. It was cut. It looked like Freddy Krueger took out a whole turkey. Nobody had a sharp enough knife. Forget that electric knife shit. What the hell was that? That just made a bunch of noise and it just like sawed into everything. You had parts of bone in your. Yeah, I never understood how they show the people doing that and they're like cutting it like butter. Oh look, oh, this works so good.
Chrisy:The remco, whatever that the commercial hey, you remember those great commercials, the thing that used to clean your records and the electric knife you're right yeah, everybody in the mr microphone, yeah, but uh, so, uh, yeah, we just hacked the shit out of it and just right.
Chrisy:I mean some we were like complete chaos. Some of shit was on the table and some you had to go over across the room and find it. You know, somebody had something on their plate. You're like, where the hell did you get that there's? Oh, over there, yeah, in that corner. Oh wow. So you'd be like doing a scavenger hunt, trying to figure out where all the little lost tidbits are. There's like some really good stuff. So I appreciate what your mom was trying to do, yeah, but I totally get why. Yeah.
Kerry:But I refuse. If I host any kind of party or whatever, it's buffet, buffet and there's no other way we're doing it.
Chrisy:I hate to say this, but I've actually no go ahead.
Kerry:Sorry, here's the big question Now. Your family, I think, partake in a little bit alcohol different than my family, because you know, there's just the differences of how we grew up. But the only time of year that we had any kind of alcohol in the house was Thanksgiving, Christmas and Easter, and what we had was Mogan David wine. Have you ever had Mogen David wine?
Chrisy:Never heard of it till right now.
Kerry:It's pleasing light. Nothing to write home about. They still sell it. Oh yeah, oh yeah, Still sell it.
Chrisy:It's still on our table the country of origin, please.
Kerry:I have no idea.
Chrisy:Oh, somebody needs to send us information on this.
Kerry:Oh OK, trust me, I'm sure it's nothing expensive, but it's very, very strong, sweet dessert wine. But I tell you what? I'm not a wine drinker, but man, I guzzle that shit down during the holidays. It's the only way I get through.
Chrisy:What's really sad about my family is yes, my father liked to have a cocktail.
Kerry:Yeah.
Chrisy:He was a social drinker. Yeah, my one sister probably not would drink socially, but not so much uh, I enjoyed it. Yeah, very much uh, at certain times in my life maybe a lot. Yeah, my other sister would also uh enjoy uh having uh beverages. But what's weird is we never really had it during the holidays which is when we should have been downing it.
Chrisy:I think we really wanted to torture ourselves. If you're going to have to do this, you have to do it sober. You got to do it clean and sober. Baby, nothing here. When you leave, whatever you do is up to you. Probably that's when all the drinking really occurred. You went home and you just drank in the corner, crying.
Kerry:You had a roadie on the way there.
Chrisy:Yeah, but no, my family was really funny because we really just didn't. That's so funny, it's so I never thought man this whole thing with this. I know If anything else is making me realize certain things. Yes, we should have been drinking during.
Kerry:It's the only way I get through the holiday these days.
Chrisy:I had a grandfather, who we're not allowed to say was an alcoholic.
Kerry:Oh, of course. Because, it's normal. You normalize it right?
Chrisy:Yes, we're going to talk about that. He was normalized. That's normal for him, right? Gramps drinking a big jug. Have you ever seen a big jug of wine? Yes, Carlo Rossi, is that the name of it? Horrible, horrible wine that comes in a jug. It looks like you should put pickles in there or something. I don't know what the hell it was.
Kerry:My man loved the Carlo Rossi, you know I think the reason why they might have liked the Mogen David now that I think about it is probably the church wine that might have been what they served at church.
Chrisy:How is it?
Kerry:I don't know what I gotta. Look this, I'll bring you a Mogen David, it's a wait spell the last.
Chrisy:It sounds like david, but I don't think you're saying david. What are you? I think it is david mogan m-o-g-a-n does our producer know anything about dj nick?
Kerry:google this on your phone. So but uh, mogen david, I'll bring you a bottle next time was it strictly red or did it come in white?
Chrisy:did it come in a?
Kerry:rose, I think, but it's very dark red. But now that I think about it it might be like church wine and that's probably. But what I'm saying is that was the only time of year that really they drank. Maybe my dad might have had a rolling rock or something, but but really they didn't drink. But even the kids at the table were allowed to have it, but we had to put a little spray in it, so like, oh, that's not a good mix.
Chrisy:I would have opted for the Seagram. If you're going to make me put seven up or spray in this, can we change it up from Mogen David?
Kerry:to somebody got some.
Chrisy:Seagram seven in there. Oh God, so Wow.
Kerry:That's a lot. That's a lot, but yeah. So that's the holidays that we're getting into now, so uh everybody. That is the best so I'm sure, like in an upcoming episode, we'll recap our thanksgiving and then we'll lead into christmas yes, the big christmas episode everybody, everybody has probably been decorated for Christmas for months already, exactly.
Kerry:But well, I want to tell you, thank you so much for joining us today. All of you listeners out there, this is what we do. This is our therapy. Now, we are not licensed therapists, but this is how we have gotten over some of our childhood trauma. We laugh about it, we talk about it, enlighten ourselves about it. We talk about it, enlighten ourselves about it.
Chrisy:We share it out there with all of you so that you can remember all the trauma you had. I mean, we don't want you to go without remembering that you also had this trauma If you were sitting there driving in your car thinking, wow, wait a minute, this happened to me too. Oh my.
Kerry:God, and if you didn't have this happen to you, oh god, you're so lucky, um, but anyways are they, though. Yeah, I mean, come on, I'm sure they have some other dysfunction, because we all do, we're all messed up, we're all broken and we love to hear about those dysfunctions.
Chrisy:How were your family dysfunctions fun? Yeah, let us know, we love to hear and we want to be able to see if we have anything in common with what you've experienced.
Kerry:Exactly so. I think we'll put some polls up on our Facebook page. Maybe we'll talk about what kind of Halloween decorations that that you had, and maybe we'll do a poll on Did you have turkey or did you have ham? Or maybe you really spiced it up and did something totally different and had Chinese food I don't know.
Chrisy:C cajun there you go so, but um so. But in the meantime, yeah, check out our facebook. I'm sure that I'm gonna get some hatred over them balloons I mean the inflatable, whatever they're called. I'm sorry people, you love them, you got them, you're allowed to have them again you do, you, you do you, I'm gonna you, I'm going to drive by though I'm probably going to think somebody shot them when they're deflated in the morning.
Kerry:All right, everyone. Thank you for joining us. Check us out on our Facebook page Also. Wherever you're streaming our podcast from, please give us a five-star review so we can keep coming at you and we'll see you next week. Bye-bye, bye-bye, bye-bye.
