Your Birthday Should Be Your Day, Not A Sidebar To Mother's Day

What happens when your birthday consistently falls near Mother's Day or Father's Day? Both hosts share how their special days were often overshadowed or completely forgotten due to holiday overlap, creating lasting impacts on how they approach celebrations. 

Kerry's visceral anxiety around her birthday stems from childhood disappointments, manifesting in a coping mechanism of planning her own getaways to avoid potential hurt. Her story resonates with anyone who's ever felt invisible on the one day meant to celebrate them.

The conversation takes a thoughtful turn when examining how childhood experiences shape our adult birthday expectations. Chrisy realizes her parents essentially provided a "high-end hotel" experience with all material needs met but limited emotional engagement, while Kerry grew up as a "parentized child" taking care of herself from an early age. These contrasting upbringings created very different relationships with birthdays and celebrations.

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Chapters

• 0:00 Birthday Memories and Family Traditions
• 6:10 Forgotten Birthdays and Mother's Day Overlap
• 11:33 Birthday Anxiety and Protective Behaviors
• 17:54 Adult Birthday Celebrations: Too Much?
• 24:06 Birthday Songs and Family Traditions
• 30:10 Final Thoughts and Listener Invitation

Transcript

DJ Nick: 0:08

Welcome to the Dysfunction Junkies Podcast. We may not have seen it all, but we've seen enough. And now here are your hosts, chrissy and Keri.

Kerry: 0:21

Hello Junkies, I'm Kerry

Chrisy: 0:24

and I'm Chrissy

Kerry: 0:32

Well, today, we thought we'd talk about another great family time of togetherness. Birthdays, yay, yay. So my birthday's in May, chrisy's birthday's in June, and each of our birthdays respectively fall very close to Mother's Day and Father's Day, so it just seemed only fitting that this would be a great time to talk about the birthday events.

Chrisy: 0:53

Yes.

Kerry: 0:53

Chrisy go.

Chrisy: 0:55

Yes, my birthday is in June. I love a birthday in June. I love it, and here's why Christmas was six months ago. Yes, now I got a birthday, so I'm getting hit great with gifts twice a year and it's enough to be able to like, basically, you know, reflect on what you got at Christmas so that you know what you need to ask for, demand for for your birthday. So that time period, I mean, I just I think it's perfect.

Kerry: 1:23

My opinion only. I agree, I always do feel bad for people whose birthdays are at Christmastime, like I do. I feel bad. My dad's birthday was like a couple of days before Christmas and I always did. I was like, oh, that's kind of sad. Like how do you, how do you differentiate that?

Chrisy: 1:38

So but I bet those people who do have birthdays close to Christmas, I could see where there might be some. Just imagine your birthday is celebrated with so many lights and decorations and I mean it's wonderful. You can sort of almost go out and say look, look, what's for me. I mean, you know.

Kerry: 1:55

Yeah, but then you're going to get people that are going to go well, I'm going to give you one, one gift.

Chrisy: 1:59

That's your Christmas and your birthday gift or something You're going to combine it Well, if it was me, I'd have to really analyze and I'd have to say okay now, if it was just Christmas we were celebrating and you got me this, I mean it's going to have to really be judged on my opinion that you did make up for the fact that we're sharing two type of big events for me in the same slot, you know.

Kerry: 2:22

How did your family handle birthdays? Were they a big?

Chrisy: 2:24

deal. No, no, not really. I mean when I was little I had birthday parties, but to be honest, I really don't remember birthday parties with like family real well. Yeah there's some photography, photographic evidence of this. I don't really recall these birthday parties where I had aunts and maybe cousins there, but I think that pretty much ended, probably when I was, probably even before I was 10. Yeah, I think some of that had to do with the passing of my grandmother to some extent.

Chrisy: 2:58

There's like that one family, usually a grandparent Right who really ties those two sides of the family together.

Kerry: 3:05

Gotcha yeah.

Chrisy: 3:06

The sibling. You know your parents, siblings and cousin and sort of once that piece falls out of the puzzle, right Things become brittle. It's not like we were on bad terms.

Kerry: 3:17

No, but that was the glue.

Chrisy: 3:19

It's early on, after somebody passes away, like that, it's hard to get together because then there's that missing spot, right, right, and then after you sort of follow that thing, it's hard to sort of get rolling again. So this isn't anything that makes me hostile or anything. It just it was what it was, my birthday being in the summer, yours also right on the brink of summer.

DJ Nick: 3:42

I guess, your spring summer.

Chrisy: 3:43

Right on the brink of summer I guess spring summer when we had a swimming pool, my parents pretty much left it up to me to organize and do my own birthday and generally that meant just having friends around.

Kerry: 3:58

Oh, okay, yeah, our family, we and I think this is where I get it from I like to make a big deal out of people's birthdays, and I think because, definitely in the early years, my mom always made a big deal out of our birthdays, so we always, it was always something special. First of all, we always got to pick where we wanted to go eat, because we didn't get to go out to eat much. Now, granted, for the longest time, that might have just been McDonald's.

DJ Nick: 4:17

That was a big deal, that was a big deal for us.

Kerry: 4:19

You know we would have parties, you know like the kids parties and everything. And then it started falling apart, like where it wasn't such a big deal. When I started getting into high school, you know, I think my mom and dad there's definitely something changed. They were on different paths, I don't know. It was like there was just me left at home and they were both working and I don't know, it's just all. My sisters were moved out of way. So it was a little different. Birthdays were kind of a big deal and so I definitely like to make a big deal out of people's birthdays. My thing is you celebrate somebody's birthday on the birthday, like on the day. So like this oh, your birthday is on Thursday, we're going to take you out for dinner on Saturday. No, Thursday is the birthday. You celebrate it on the birthday, Like that's kind of strict.

Kerry: 5:02

Well, that's the day Now. I'm all for making it a week-long celebration. Don't get me wrong on that. You can continue the celebration, but there has to be something on the birthday. Well.

Chrisy: 5:15

I do believe that on the date, of the birth, uh, the person. You have to have a cake, yes, and you have some sort of cake right with a candle, something with fire shooting off the top of it that you have to put out with your breath.

Kerry: 5:34

Yes, that is required on your birth on right, and that's what I mean. I'm totally fine if we do the cake and stuff on the birthday, but we're gonna maybe live it up on the weekend because whatever it sees, I'm 100% with you on that. But there has to be acknowledgement and celebration of some problems in the dynamics of family and other kids getting older now having their own families, like with nieces and nephews, and they're having kids.

Chrisy: 6:13

And now we have even more birthdays. Like, my side is really just not involved in this, because I don't have a big family, and Nick he does have many sisters that he is in communication with all the time, which is great, and I have a superstition. Here's another one. Sometimes I think my mind because I was exposed to so many baloney superstitions, I create new ones for myself, and I don't even know that anybody ever told me this or why I think this. I can't celebrate my kids' birthdays prior to their birthday.

Kerry: 6:47

Oh, okay.

Chrisy: 6:47

For some reason. To me that is bad. It's almost like you're exposing yourself, saying, yes, I definitely this is dark man, oh God.

Chrisy: 6:57

We're getting dark right now. I feel like if you're like, yes, my birthday is not until next week, it's convenient for everybody to celebrate it now. And then I dropped dead because I said well, I already celebrated my birthday. So, like fate or the gods or whoever controls karma, says well, you already celebrated your birthday. This is a good time to strike you down dead, so you don't celebrate anything prior to it. My goal always is to make it to that event. Birthdays anniversaries.

Kerry: 7:28

So if you were going to throw your kids a birthday party, then you would need to do it on a weekend. For convenience you would do it the weekend after not the weekend before. So even if their birthday was Monday, you wouldn't have the birthday the Sunday before.

DJ Nick: 7:41

Hell. No, it would have to be oh that good, I can respect that.

Chrisy: 7:45

I can totally respect that, and you know, if their birthday happens to fall on the weekend, bonus, yeah, but no, it either has to be their birthday yeah, actually, or the time afterwards.

Kerry: 7:57

Okay, no celebrating prior None I have no problems with that. That celebrating prior None, I have no problems with that. That, to me, makes total sense. And again, you're acknowledging on the birthday something, so you're having the cake or something, even if it's just you guys, your intimate family, on that day, right?

Chrisy: 8:14

And it usually is just the, you know, mom, with my kids, it's just us. Yeah, you know, but yeah, you have to.

Kerry: 8:21

I have such a juxtaposition about birthdays because, as much as I love them and I want to make a big deal out of them and I do make a big deal out of other people's birthdays and everything there is a part of me that has huge anxiety about my birthday.

Chrisy: 8:37

Now, why is that?

Kerry: 8:38

I think it's because it was forgotten one too many times by people.

Chrisy: 8:42

Oh, my God, You're like the opening of 16 candles. You mean people actually flip and forgot your birthday. Yes, parents, yes, oh, my Carrie, jesus, god, this is terrible and Carrie go.

Kerry: 8:55

I want to hear it. Well, I should say it's maybe not so much that they forgot, but it got overshadowed because of Mother's Day. So many times my birthday falls on the exact same day as Mother's Day.

Chrisy: 9:11

As mine does with Father's Day.

Kerry: 9:12

Gonna happen this year? Oh, is it? It's gonna happen this year. So what happens is you know what would happen is they would, oh, like the Christmas birthdays and the Christmas thing put it all together. Oh well, we'll just do one. We'll celebrate Mother's Day and Carrie's birthday all at the same time, and then it gets overshadowed. And then as you get older, you know again big age gap in the family from me and the siblings, and then it was just you know us at home, or oh, we had Mother's Day. Oh yeah, I forgot that Carrie's birthday is the next day. There would be like this no mention of you.

Kerry: 9:47

Yeah, or it would be a last minute, like all of a sudden at bedtime. Oh my gosh, we forgot it was your birthday. I thought it was yeah, and sorry, Jim, I'm going to call you out on this one.

Chrisy: 10:01

No no, no, carrie, yeah, don't even do this In his defense.

Kerry: 10:07

I think it was the very first year we were together, but we had been together for almost a year by the time my birthday rolled around and he didn't. He forgot it was my birthday, oh my God. And so that just already having those you like I don't know how do you say birthday abandonment issues, I get this anxiety because it's like, and then, as I've gotten older, I feel like I would have to plan my own event okay I get this anxiety of like see, oh my god, do you see me?

Kerry: 10:40

I just took a deep, yes you're having you're definitely having a reaction, so it's like your face is red.

Kerry: 10:48

I know, oh my god, I know this is what I'm saying. I want to celebrate it and I want to be celebrated, but I'm afraid people won't celebrate it or they'll forget. My response to that is then I will plan my own getaway and we will often go away, because I feel like if I leave, then if people forget or they don't do anything or don't reach out, it's OK because I wasn't available. So I'm giving you know, I'm creating a pass for people. I know it's it's so dysfunctional.

Chrisy: 11:15

Yeah that's. I know a lot of trouble to go through to accommodate other people's shortcomings, to protect myself accommodate other people's shortcomings to protect myself.

Kerry: 11:26

But so for my 50th birthday a few years ago it was like months before my 50th birthday I started having this huge anxiety about my birthday. And it wasn't about turning 50, but it was the fact that it was my 50th birthday and I was so afraid that I'm like okay, what if this is another year where it's forgotten or underplayed or not played or whatever. And that's almost as bad too. When the people celebrate your birthday because they feel they have to, like it's an obligation, like to me, it's just as bad. I know I'm so, I'm so messed up about this.

Kerry: 11:54

So what I did was I went to Jim and I said I'm just going to ask you now and the answer is completely okay. I said have you given any thought about what you're going to do in three months for my 50th birthday? And he kind of looked at me like there was no right answer for him. So he was like I'm going to be completely honest. No, I have not given a thought. And I'm like that's okay. I got it and I planned this big trip to Jamaica. We went to Jamaica and I said I'm okay with that. You didn't plan anything because it is still three months away. I'm saving you and I'm saving me. So we planned a trip, and then our friends went with us too, but I will often escape on my birthday, and it's purely a defense tachyonism, yeah.

Chrisy: 12:34

Wow, I know, talk about dysfunction. Is that not dysfunctional?

Kerry: 12:39

Well, yeah, so in the same token is what you dealt with as far as celebrating generally Mother's Day with your birthday on certain years when it fell that way, but it's so weird because as much attention as my father generally demanded.

Chrisy: 13:08

Yeah, and maybe I was just sort of the same, I also demanded as much, and they sort of canceled each other out. The apple didn't fall far from the tree. No, not at all. Remembering back then I don't remember really feeling shorted or underplayed, Because I think early on it was basically just my understanding that you know, yes, you can invite over whoever you want, how many people you want, and go swimming, and I would usually request what I wanted there generally pizza or are we ordering something? And I would generally tell them what I wanted as far as a cake and that was provided. So it was sort of like just to keep you planned your own stuff, though. Well, I guess I kind of did Again. Again, it was pretty much like that whole thing where I talk about, where they just basically just give her whatever she wants and then we don't pay attention anymore yeah and it was easy for them just to say yes, you got friends here.

Chrisy: 13:58

That means I don't need to focus on you for anything. I got food here for you, not gonna be going without, and we'll supply food for your friends Snacks, drinks, whatever. Cake yeah, I'll get you a beautiful cake. It'll be here ready to go. Ice cream, whatever.

Chrisy: 14:12

And then generally I don't even remember them being home. Wow, Really, I probably should have taken more advantage as I got old. I did actually. You know, things got a little crazy later on and again they were the perfect parents for me. Yeah, Because I have no hostility that I know of, for that you know.

Kerry: 14:30

Yeah, I can't say I have hostility, but it manifests itself in anxiety.

Chrisy: 14:36

There's something going on there. There's something, because you can see the physical reaction right. Yeah, that was physical. I thought you were going to maybe turn into like a transformer. You were really upset. I was going to start crying or turn green, I don't know.

Kerry: 14:53

I think it really stems from this whole thing of you know I grew, you know I don't know if you've heard this, the phrase about the parent, parentized child I think that's how they say it Parentized child, it's basically where you know the child grows up taking care of themselves or their parents. And I feel like in a lot of ways that was me, because, you know, again, I remember first, second grade. I would get up for school on my own. I'd have to iron my own uniform, I'd have to pack my own lunch, I would wake my mom up so she would watch me go out the door and so she was watching me at the end of the driveway to make sure no one stole me while I was waiting for the bus at the end of the driveway. But I did all of that. I then come home from school no parent home, so I was taking care.

Kerry: 15:36

So I grew up with this having to take care of myself in a lot of ways and also, therefore, was not protected. You know we talked about before different abuse and things that happened. I wasn't protected. It's, I think it's kind of all of that stems together and here you have this great occasion and then to be forgotten about, or the sideshow again. It just creates all of this totally dysfunction around one silly day of the year.

Kerry: 16:02

So I am a hot mess in the beginning of May around my birthday and the other thing that gets me is I know people that know this about me will try to protect me, so they'll want to think they're doing a good thing by. Okay, I know you really want this particular person to remember. At your birthday today. People will try to remind that person and I'm always like I'm on to it. I know it's like don't you tell them to remind them about my birthday? Like I know I let them hurt me and forget. I would rather have that than you remind them. And then I get the call because they have to. You know what I mean. You know you're looking at me with such no I.

Chrisy: 16:35

to be honest, what I'm thinking right now is I better goddamn make sure I have your birthday on my calendar. I'm going to put posters up in my room. I'm going to have my phone go off all day Because I knew, I always remember it being in May and I know. No, I feel I don't even want to tell you the date. I know when it is. That's it. I'm just going to.

Kerry: 16:59

You can say the date because I already said, this year it's going to happen on Mother's Day.

Chrisy: 17:03

But I don't know when Mother's Day is. Do you think that I'm that in tune to that? Then I got to deal with the parent. Come on, is it the?

Kerry: 17:12

14th no.

Chrisy: 17:15

I didn't say that I didn't come out. It was more of a noise in the back of my throat. It's in the middle of the month before the middle.

Kerry: 17:24

Oh, it's the 12th. I'm totally letting you no.

Chrisy: 17:27

The 11th, yes oh my God, what am I just writing on my paper? Huge May 11th. It's the same day as my sister. Please don't tell me. You know when mine is.

Kerry: 17:38

June 17th God.

Chrisy: 17:39

But everybody knows that date because it's the same day as the Watergate break-in.

Kerry: 17:43

I have no idea what that reference is. The the watergate mcnixon. I was born on the exact same day as that watergate break-in. Oh well, I was.

Chrisy: 17:54

I was a month and oh, six days old. Yeah, I remember that. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Now everybody celebrates watergate, don't they?

Kerry: 17:59

no, nobody does anymore, okay you know how I remember, though how now I remember and correlate your birthday, but I knew what your birthday was is because that's our wedding anniversary there. That's why you were no but I knew it from before.

Chrisy: 18:13

But I'm just saying, that's how you planned the day you were exactly, because everything revolves around chrissy see, now I got to share my birthday with that too, and well, my dad's deceased. So that's, that problem was taken out of the equation, but it was never a problem. You, as you were talking, I finally realized what my situation was, growing up with my parents what, and everybody would have wished they were me, which I always felt anyhow.

Kerry: 18:37

What is that?

Chrisy: 18:38

I basically had the life like I lived in a high end hotel. Oh, yeah, you did. My clothes were washed. Yeah, my shirts were ironed for me. Yeah, my skirt was pressed for me. Yes, my shirts were ironed for me. My skirt was pressed for me.

Chrisy: 18:48

My clothes were laid out and purchased for me, my meals were already made and waiting for me. There was no need for anybody to be there. All my wants and needs were cared for. I had a room that had a VCR, cable, stereo system, all my stupid crap in it, and there was nothing I needed or wanted. No, you didn't. I must have had the best here. I thought they were lousy parents. I'm going to have to retire from the podcast now. I haven't noticed they were like the best. Chrissy has this enlightenment Because I never really wanted to have any time with them. Right, I just wanted, I wanted. I'm a child of need. I still am. I'm a big child of need. I want, I want, but yes, so I am so grateful.

Kerry: 19:37

Good for you.

Chrisy: 19:38

I am feeling horrible.

Kerry: 19:39

So you call, call Jano today and tell her your to one Mother's Day. You'll be able to say to her, you'll be able to have something to be grateful for. I'll get her a couple extra flowers this year. Okay, there you go, oh my gosh.

Chrisy: 19:51

Wow, now some people, though. Let's talk about these types. What, unless you were going to have another? No we can go on. I am totally opposed to people as adults having birthday big bashes Now for milestone birthdays. I'm not going to crap on that Gotcha, but every goddamn year and I know again these people I don't think listen, and I don't care if you do, I'm not shy about this.

DJ Nick: 20:17

Yes.

Chrisy: 20:18

I'm 50 years old now. You're not going to cause me any heartache. Why do we have to celebrate your birthday every year like you're a child? You mean, like sisters, they love their birthday the one sister like sisters, they love their birthday the one sister birthday month. She has stuff scheduled every weekend, but people love her. Hey, it speaks volumes about who you are. Yeah, the people love you that much they want to celebrate your birthday. Oh, goddamn month Congratulations. You've obviously been kind and giving your whole life that these people still wanted to celebrate you to the flipping limits. Yeah, not me, I don't care. I'm thrilled that you even knew my birthday and I'm thrilled that you got married on my birthday and I love you for it.

Chrisy: 21:04

But I don't and I get agitated. I'm glad we kind of live far away. They send us the text. We're going to have so-and-so's birthday celebration at my house and they usually will send you the menu so you know what you're eating. Oh well, that's good and you can't even get away with that. I always like why don't we go out to a restaurant? We're all adults, especially before I had kids. No, they have. No, they're not allowed that somebody has to go out of their way to have it at their home, oh but not the birthday person's home?

Chrisy: 21:33

okay, they're not doing anything that day. I like that cleaning, I like they're not going to clean up after I'm not making one damn dish I like that, and then the dip sister has to bring dip, of course, but they have someone has to prep the meal and they're not give them credit. They go all out with the meal.

Kerry: 21:53

I mean, it's like a holiday can I be part of your family, nick?

Chrisy: 21:57

oh, they'll love it, as long as you're going to acknowledge their birthday.

Kerry: 21:59

I mean don't come empty-handed, as long as they, as long as it's give and take oh, that's what I want.

Chrisy: 22:04

Oh well, yeah, oh yeah, once you get on their schedule, let me think, is your birthday in? Uh, well, it's close to one of the other siblings you got to watch with that, so they have a whole meal. And then I was like, well, why can't you guys just buy a cake? God damn it. Why does somebody have to make a cake? That's such crap. There's so many places you can get a great cake. Someone has to, usually a banana nut cake. What's wrong with that? I don't know who birthday? No banana nut cake. I know you are the winner blue ribbon winner of banana nut bread and nick is on board with that. But as much as he likes banana nut, bread.

Kerry: 22:39

He don't want a banana.

Chrisy: 22:40

I don't think he also is oh, it's not just.

Kerry: 22:42

It's always a banana cake, not for everybody. Okay, I was gonna say no, it's it's whatever sister, with the sister once and I okay one sister in particular loves always like okay, well then, there's nothing wrong with that no, it's their day but again I'm thinking so every year.

Chrisy: 22:58

It's a big deal. And then one time a few times, this came up. I kind of got mad because they all had their designated months for their birthday and their day, that we're going to celebrate it. And then my husband's birthday and his one, his oldest sister's birthday, are close, as far as not year, of course, because there's like almost 12 years between them, but where his is in January, hers is in December. Okay, she's at the end, he's sort of at the beginning, sort of not so much, but close.

Kerry: 23:29

Do they do the same day party?

Chrisy: 23:31

Well, when we would bring it up, because two of his other sisters have, one in April and one in May, uh-huh, and they would never combine those.

Kerry: 23:40

I really like your family, Nick.

Chrisy: 23:50

But because we went into the holiday lag for that December-January mix that sometimes they would say we're going to combine, we're going to tack on Nick's birthday with so-and-so's birthday. Yeah, and I used to be like look, we just went through all that. We used to go through all this trouble with special meals designated for special things and you're going to do this to my husband.

Kerry: 24:03

No, that's wrong.

DJ Nick: 24:05

They've been combining the other ones lately.

Chrisy: 24:07

Well, because everybody's getting old man, they've been combining the other ones lately, because everyone's getting old man.

DJ Nick: 24:09

Nobody wants to do all this crap, but you know I don't want to say too much, but I just want to say this Sunday, have a happy birthday aww, thank you, nick, get out of here.

Chrisy: 24:20

Go sit over there. I'm going to buy her something nice. One time I bought Carrie a Wheel of Fortune watch she did.

Kerry: 24:27

I love that watch. It was the best. It was like a swatch watch, but it was wheel of fortune yeah and oh, I loved I had it for the boyfriend at the time. He did not like it they brought her something cool, cooler than he could get me well, we're not, I know, because he didn't get you the wheel of fortune right.

Chrisy: 24:47

that's why you and I are sitting here today this is true.

Kerry: 24:52

So what other traditions do you have? Do you have any special songs or anything other than the traditional birthday song? Do you do anything else? You know how you were talking.

Chrisy: 25:00

Oh my God, she brought up the song thing. I'm going to have to talk about the song thing.

Kerry: 25:06

Do you have the family?

Chrisy: 25:07

song thing, no, well, no, I won't forget this. So you tell us about your song. No, you go first.

Kerry: 25:11

All right, crissy go, crissy go.

Chrisy: 25:14

So I am traditional, which is you think some of this crazy can't be.

DJ Nick: 25:19

But the happy birthday song.

Chrisy: 25:21

Yeah, happy birthday, that's enough. Now, if you happen to be at a restaurant, I know like sometimes, if you go to a Mexican restaurant, they sing you their version of Happy Birthday. Awesome, that's fine. Because you're at a restaurant, yeah, but when you're at home with family, happy birthday song, traditional, that's it. That is it One song?

DJ Nick: 25:44

Now.

Chrisy: 25:45

Nick's family because again they got to go all out, or whatever the hell you want to call this. They have three goddamn songs they have to sing before you can blow out your candles. And my kids for the longest time were so confused because they know we just sing one song and then you blow, and so they'd be sitting at the table and we would sing the song and then they start into a new song. So then the kid has to back off the candle. So then after the second song they're like, okay, I'm gonna go.

Chrisy: 26:11

no, now there's another song oh, this is great and I'd be like, oh my god, and it was so hard, because kids are excited, they want both the cameras, because then generally they're going to open their presents, yeah, but we got to go through this whole thing, yeah, so generally, you know, it's just in rebellion I would generally not sing the other two songs, even though the words were very simple and I knew them. I'm like you know what I'm? Just I'm, I'm rebelling, I'm not singing your songs.

Chrisy: 26:36

You're not singing the song and I ain't eating the dip, I don't even know I'm not even I'm not explaining dip and I'm not singing three songs, so did have that growing up. I'm just curious we what they? I think they started all this stuff when I finally got into his life, just to be irritating. He doesn't even remember any of this dj nick go what's the songs?

DJ Nick: 26:57

so the second song is it's basically using the same melody as a happy birthday song, but it's.

Chrisy: 27:01

May the dear lord bless you oh okay, I've heard that okay yeah, then the last song is we wish you a happy birthday, A very happy birthday. We wish you a happy birthday. Happy birthday to you.

Kerry: 27:15

And then somebody usually says or something afterwards, and it's just like I have no problem with that.

Chrisy: 27:23

Carrie, it's too much.

DJ Nick: 27:26

I think they added the you know may the dear Lord, bless you to try to cancel Christy's reservation in hell.

Kerry: 27:35

They're sending. That's their gift to you.

Chrisy: 27:37

They never sing that to me. You know why? Because I never have a damn birthday party.

Kerry: 27:45

So our family and we do this and and we love everyone really loves it. And when we do it, when there's get togethers and there's not just family and there's outside people, other people, friends or whatever it always catches everyone off guard, but they love it. But the good thing is it's after the candle, so you don't have to wait. So we do the traditional birthday song. Right, the person blows out the candle and when they blow out the candle we start. So Right, the person blows out the candle and when they blow out the candle we start. So I'll use your name. So today is Chrissy's birthday, birthday birthday. Today is Chrissy's birthday. We count the years away and then we clap the years and the age of the person. So one, two, three, four, five, six, until you get to their age.

Chrisy: 28:23

So it's great, it gets the kids, everything going Well, it's really funny whenever like last year, my mom's 85th birthday party we started this, so it got really. You couldn't do it by 10.

Kerry: 28:33

No, you don't do it by 10 you gotta count the years and usually the funny thing is the longer it is, the older the person is. When you get to the longer numbers you're like 77, 78, like you drag it out. You know it's like that bottles of beer song, it is kind of like that.

Kerry: 28:47

Yes, yes, but it's fun and we enjoy it. But it's always, I love, when we're in a mixed crowd and we do that. We just everyone just starts in because you'll see the people. But that don't know, they'll be like wait, what's happening, what's happening here? And then they, oh, oh, this is fun. And they start clapping and joining in.

Chrisy: 29:03

So, yeah, the, that is our birthday okay, I would be standing there completely off guard now that you're doing this Probably annoyed, fairly quickly.

Kerry: 29:12

Probably.

Chrisy: 29:12

And then I'd have to turn to Nick or somebody and say, okay, wait, remind me again. How old is this person, what number?

Kerry: 29:18

are we counting to? How long am I going to? Because I'm going to lose interest real quick and get sidetracked and stop, I'm glad you love it, so that's why I have no problem with nick's songs I guess I should appreciate that, because I don't know how I feel about the clapping the key, though, is it's after the blowout of the candles, so you only have the birthday song, the blowout, and then that goes into the next song.

Chrisy: 29:41

So you don't have to wait, you know but if I showed up at the party late and I just got there when you were doing the cake thing but I I haven't eaten yet, oh, I'm going to get very hostile Because I'm really. I'm like, okay, I'm sorry I'm late, I know you guys kind of everybody already ate, but there's still food here for me. Yeah, let's do the cake, and I want to get over there to eat.

Kerry: 29:58

Yeah.

Chrisy: 29:58

And now you're doing this which takes like 10 minutes and I'm starving and the they're starting to put it away and I'm like put the food away Once they finish this BS. Over here I'm chowing down. So wow, wow, congrats on that.

Kerry: 30:15

I guess I don't know what to say. Well, that was fun. Maybe, maybe, hopefully, this year I won't have so much anxiety about my birthday.

Chrisy: 30:24

No, I've got to. The week is early, I do, the week is early I have anxiety, because I feel like I'm going to have to make up for every lousy ass that didn't do what they were supposed to do. Damn, oh my.

Kerry: 30:39

Well, we want to hear your family's birthday. Horror stories, happy stories, songs, traditions, whatever it is, or how they relate to Mother's day, father's day, those type of things or other holidays, or other holidays yes let us know, check us out on our facebook page and then, as always, please be sure to hit that like or follow or subscribe button on whatever streaming cast, that you're listening to us too, and we look forward to seeing you next week.

Chrisy: 31:05

Bye-bye happy birthday, carrie. Thank you, week bye-bye. Happy birthday, carrie.