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Dysfunction Junkies
Two high school besties reconnect and commiserate their stories as they navigate the dysfunctions of life from marriage, families, illness, death of childhood families, and creating healthy boundaries. Join them each week as Chrisy and Kerry share their stories and life lessons all with a zest of wit, humor, and love. They may not have seen it all, but they have seen enough!
Dysfunction Junkies
Advent Calendar Chaos And Real Talk On Kolachi, Holiday Cookies, And Gift Ideas
Holiday chaos feels different when the gift list is short, shipping is smarter, and the advent calendar has whiskey. Listen to this week's episode, come for the laughs, leave with real gift ideas and cookie strategy. Which cookie must make the tray this year?
#adventcalendars #holidaybaking #christmascookies #lettersbylanternlight #kolachi #dysfunctionjunkiespodcast
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Welcome to the Dysfunction Junkies Podcast. We may not have seen it all, but we've seen enough. And now, here are your hosts, Chrissy and Carrie.
KERRY:Well, I gave you. Oh my lord. I love our music. I love it. I love it. It's good stuff. It is good stuff. Hi, I'm Carrie. And I'm Chrissy. It's the holidays. Boy, is it ever? How's your holiday shopping coming along, Chrissy?
CHRISY:It's it's fine because I don't really buy for anyone except my children. There you go. So I keep it very simple. My husband and I, we don't even exchange, uh, we haven't done that for a long time. Pretty much since we've had kids, but it's fine. Yeah, you know.
KERRY:Our holiday shopping list is not very long either. You know, there was a time where I would start thinking about it in like July, and I would like, you know, so that way it didn't all happen at once, and I wasn't having, you know, but now the list is small enough, and now I've I've learned the art of having things shipped direct, and that helps tremendously. You know, because I used to buy it and then I'd bring it home and then I'd want to ship it. Well, oh my gosh, the shipping cost. Holy heck. Who are these people you're shipping gifts to? Why are they so special? They're my peeps. They're your peeps. And so when I move to Utah for Christmas, you'll be you'll be my peep that I have to send something to. Well, that is. See, right now you're here. I know.
CHRISY:So well, and I just it's wonderful to be thought of. I'm not trying to crap all over the fact that you're actually thinking of someone that's wonderful, and you should. Yeah. Please don't ship sauerkraut.
KERRY:No, that's an in-person gift. So I had to take advantage of that while I stole me. It's gonna be very sour by the time I get here.
CHRISY:But yeah, I mean, I'm I don't think I've in my whole life.
KERRY:This is really terrible. Really?
CHRISY:I don't think I've ever shipped a gift anyone.
KERRY:Oh, there's been Christmases I've had like 10 packages that I've had to ship. And I'll try to condense it. So, like if I have a group of people, I'll send it to like one person and say, Hey, you need to assimilate that out to other people in the area for me because it's so expensive. Now my lips are too getting people to work for you like that.
CHRISY:That's nice. You're very liked. I'd be like, Can you drop this off? Like, get the hell out of here. I ain't doing nothing. That sounds like you're at a total different level of likability, which we already knew that.
KERRY:Oh, because I'm a cary. I know. So, but no, now what I I tend to do is I tend to uh find things online and order it, and then I'll ship it to that's been a saving grace because then you know you don't have to worry about you don't have to wait in line at the post office with like boxes and everything with everybody else and dropping things and yeah, so it seems the line at the post office seems like a real retro type of idea. It is very retro, it is, but you know, there is something nice about getting getting something in the mail, though. There there is something nice.
CHRISY:Maybe it's just me, but as soon as I see something that's uh of adequate size that I don't know right away what it is or who it's from, I'm highly suspicious that it's gonna go off. I'm being completely honest, I really do think things will, or it contains something that I just don't want to open.
KERRY:Well, I am gonna give a shout out to one of the one of my I think the elf on the shelf is moving upstairs, Chrissy. It's trying to get or is it the mench on the bench? I I hid it somewhere and shouldn't be able to get out. Is it the dwarf in the drawer? Anyways, I am going to give a really special shout-out to a company who I just recently came across, and and they're not a sponsor, but I am giving them a huge shout-out for us from this episode. Go ahead. And this is called Letters by Lantern Light. It's a company is created by an author, Don Porter, and it includes snail mail stories that unfold in a series of letters mailed to you at a rate of two letters per month. And the stories can range from three months to 12 months. You pick the, you know, when you're picking out the stories, you you pick how often you want the, you know, like what story, what size length. It's nice, it's totally PG-rated. There's no on-page violence, no romance or foul language, but it's it's that old-fashioned getting a letter in the mail and reading these stories. Kind of along that lines of like shipping things and you're getting a present, although you think it's a bomb. No, this is a wholesome, nice. So if you're looking for a special gift for somebody, I highly recommend Letters by Lantern Light. You can go to their website, letters by lanternlight.com, and pick a nice gift like this. So this too, this is the kind of gifts I like to give. So I like to give a gift that keeps on giving. So this is kind of nice, but also it's just that getting something in the mail. There's just a light.
CHRISY:Um there's a lot I could say, but I won't. Chrissy. Because you feel really good about that. I do feel really good about it. I'm gonna say it is that is a really wonderful idea. I think there's a lot of people who actually really appreciate that and enjoy it. Yeah. So you don't want a subscription? You can it would be beautiful to get something like that. I'm sure it probably comes in a lovely little envelope. It does.
KERRY:And then you can you can also get a nice little box that you can keep them all in. Oh now, wait a minute. You don't want me keeping things. Why are you even trying to get me?
Speaker 5:That is uh it's better than a bomb.
CHRISY:It is, and um it sounds wonderful, and I think there's a lot of uh it it it's just me, okay? It's just me because it involves reading.
KERRY:Oh, there you go. That's from Elasha. Yeah, I mean, if you ship me a movie. Okay. Um you know what? I bet you you could find something on the internet for a gift that's of digital format like that.
CHRISY:It would have to come and it would be like it give me the QR codes. They're also on gravestones, which we realize. Right. You can give me that and I can scan it, scan it, and watch a move. I bet you there is. Oh my god. We just created this. If this is not already out there, it's ours.
KERRY:Don't touch it. All right. We've we we're we're claiming it. Yeah. Okay. And then Chrissy can, you know, download things to it and oh, that would be something we could sell. Well, we got we gotta get this online store going. We need to get the online store going with a QR code.
CHRISY:We're gonna investigate that before this airs. Okay. And if there's just dead air here, yeah, we came across something fantastic. I love it. To be continued. To be continued. So the other lantern light, whatever. Letters by lantern light. I just feel like when you said that, I picture a guy on a horse with a lantern running saying the British are coming. Is that wrong? This is not like a headless horseman thing. What do you mean that's history? You're talking about Paul Revere, right? Oh, yeah, that's what you're doing.
KERRY:Yeah. And he sang that sounds. This is such a cute thing, and then there's this cat that's part of it, and this cat has this whole oh it's and I'm allergic, so now I'm sneezing. Oh my god.
CHRISY:Can they get a dog as part of it? Can we change out our pet choices?
KERRY:You need to be flexible with these things, Chrissy. All right, well, let's move on to some of the other topics that we have. Okay, what do we got? Advent calendars. What is going on with everything? What the hell? What the hell? I'm excited about the one option. What? The cheese? No. Well, the cheese would be good.
CHRISY:25 days of uh a little cube of cheese. You get different cheeses every day. Is it the Gandhi, like starvation advent calendar?
KERRY:No, but the one I'm really excited about is the whiskey one where every day it's a different whiskey.
CHRISY:But do you notice usually the ones that give you like the wine or the bourbon or whatever? It's generally not a 24 or 25 day. It's usually they split it, they cut, because they don't want to create a problem. It's 12. They're not trying.
KERRY:So they're doing the 12 days of Christmas. They're not doing the advent. Right. So you should have like one for two days. So one bourbon every two days. One bourbon ain't lasting me two days. That one bourbon's gonna last me. I mean, usually it's a shot, so it's a half a drink.
CHRISY:I know, I know. I I just the whole thing is I had a I do still have it. I don't use it anymore because the medication I'm on doesn't permit me to uh participate in the cocktails as as much as I used to like to. Yes. So, but I bought a cocktail maker.
KERRY:Yeah, I know I want it. If you decide to get rid of that, you can it you're leaving with it today.
CHRISY:No. I would buy another water tank for it. Oh, just because it's important to have that part of it really good.
KERRY:Yeah, because I don't we don't use it. It was this has been on my wish list since you bought one.
CHRISY:Oh my god.
KERRY:Since you bought yours. This on has a you can just say the name.
CHRISY:It's Bartesian. They're not a sponsor, but it was it was a wonderful idea. I am on board with it. Really been on my wish list. And i the some of the cocktails are better than others, but they have some really great ones. Yeah. And they do do a thing once a year with theirs. It's it's 12 cocktails. It's 12.
KERRY:Um so I buy two, two sets. That gets me 24, so I can have one a day.
CHRISY:Yeah, you could. Okay. They have plenty of other choices. You can do that on your own. But uh it's Christmas. It's Christmas. Woo-hoo! It's it's fine. Um Jim's gonna be like, God dang it.
DJ NICK:Are you sure you won this?
CHRISY:Something else to pack though, when you're it's it's it's not too big, but it it's not it's not blender size. I mean, it's bigger.
Speaker 5:Okay, all right. Take it on the plane with you, that's all.
KERRY:Um, so I'm already traveling with two dogs, a bird, a cat. Um anyway.
CHRISY:Sounds like pretty a lot. The the advent calendar thing. You definitely need it. Yeah. We used to have like these little things that we would put up. I know I used to have one long time ago. It was in the shape of a Santa Claus. It had nothing in it. Right. It was a piece of cardboard, decorative cardboard. It had little windows on it. Yep. And you just went up to it and you opened it and looked at what was in the window, and that was the other one. That was it. Boring. But it at that time it was wonderful. I remember we used to do the one where the Santa Claus and it had the 25 little circles on it, and you took a cotton ball and you built Santa's beard every day. Oh, I never saw that.
unknown:Well, what happened to that?
CHRISY:That was nice for kids, and they're creating uh a Santa Claus.
KERRY:Kids were eating probably the cotton ball. No.
CHRISY:It's just it it got taken over with this because you that's too that is too just you know, it's not exciting enough.
Speaker 5:There's no you can't compete. Yeah, because you're getting Santa putting making Santa's beard or eating a eating some chocolate every day. Or having a cocktail.
CHRISY:The the cocktail. Okay, this adult it again. We've taken a holiday that is meant mainly for children. Yep. And we like with Halloween, and we've turned it into it's for adults.
KERRY:It's because us children grew up having only the advent calendar with the little open the window, and now there's a a light in, you know, a background drop light, or putting Santa's beard on it. We're like, what the heck? So now us adults are rebelling and we're recreating it and we're having cocktails. And I just realized the best thing I could have done, here's what you do: you get two advent calendars. You get the cheese one, and you get the cocktail one. They have wine and cheese. They have one.
CHRISY:So you get wine and cheese. They have one for tea and coffee. Boo. The chocolate one is ridiculous, everyone. Tell me right now that you're able to take that teeny tiny little one piece of chocolate and you gotta wait till tomorrow to get the second one.
KERRY:I mean, isn't that why they create the sampler box that you give away at Christmas, anyways? I don't know. It's basically the advent candle advent advent candle, advent box or the calendar, but it's just you just there's no requirement of days.
CHRISY:No, I I've I I fell into this with my kid. Again, like with the elf, I fell into this because I had kids, and they but they they've gotten really crazy now. I they just sort of I think I got my daughter the one year it was the Lego one because my daughter liked Legos. Okay, which was nice because then each day you sort of build, and then at the end you had like a whole like oh, so each day created it added to one big one, yeah. Sort of. I mean it had like one thing where it sort of and then eventually it all made sense. Okay. It was like little Lego things you create, and you're creating something, and Legos in general are a fun toy. And I I mean I think they're great for kids because they're they're building, they're imagining, they're putting things together, so it's making them think. And I got uh, I think my other daughter one that was like Lego, or not no, the Lego I did Little People, Fisher Price Little People. Oh, but they were all like holiday themed. So again, you had like you'd open up one window, and the one day you got like this little boy who was like skiing, and then another day you would open up another window. It was actually his skis. Oh and it was like a Christmas theme, it was nice. And they have like cars for boys. I think uh the the like Hot Wheels has one. Which those are fun and they're nice. It it is fun. The food thing, I guess, is fun for the adults. Yeah. But geez, oh man, do you see how many different I think they have one that's after our favorite Christmas movie, or at least in our top um Google five. The Christmas story had an advent calendar. Oh, did they? They did. And I think uh some um you can find those that are themed after like uh cartoons, uh movies, or TV shows, which are fun, but then you end up with all these like little pieces, and what are you gonna do at the end of the day? They might look cool on a shelf when you're displaying them for the holiday, but then after that, right? You gotta pack this stuff away. And are you gonna put it out the next year? I don't know, because by next year, it's a racket. You're gonna have to get it the new You have to get the new one.
KERRY:The new one. Right. Yeah, there's definitely a lot out here. There's definitely something for everybody. There's a fishing advent calendar where everything is different fishing things. That's a 24-day set.
CHRISY:Do they have like the advent calendar for like the TV show Breaking Bad? I would be interested what you get when you open the next one. Breaking bad.
KERRY:Let's just see. Well, there's SpongeBob Square Pants SquarePants. That comes up. That's what comes up whenever you do breaking bad. There's a Stranger Things advent calendar. National Geographic. Chrissy, what about Rhett and Link? Do they have an advent calendar?
CHRISY:Oh, we're gonna talk about Rhett and Link. I don't know.
KERRY:I just know Oh, here's the Christmas story advent calendar. You're right. Yeah, they had one of those. They had that.
CHRISY:Well, you just gave them an idea because I tell you, these two guys really do.
KERRY:We need Chrissy! We need one!
CHRISY:Oh, wait till you see what I put in my advent.
KERRY:If we had a dysfunction junkies advent calendar, what would be what would be behind it?
CHRISY:We're not gonna tell you, but I think it's a good another idea. This episode is all about coming up with ideas. Y'all want to spend your money on stuff that's ridiculous? We want to take your money for what is ridiculous. We're gonna come up with one. It's too late this year, but we gotta work on this for next year.
KERRY:A dumpster fire Christmas ornament advent calendar.
CHRISY:There you go. Dumpster fire. Now, the the ornament one, those advent type calendars, those are kind of nice because if you had a child who had maybe like their own little tree, yeah, and you wanted it, they could put an ornament on every day. I think that would be. I could get on board with that. Yeah. Yes.
KERRY:So yeah, there's something for everyone else.
CHRISY:Advent calendar's gone wild. I wonder if there's any adult. No, I'm just thinking.
KERRY:Adult toy advent calendar. DJ Nick, you can Google that on your phone. Gemini that on your phone. Because I don't know. Adult toy advent calendar. Because it is a little crazy about when you start Googling things or Geminiing things or watching reels. What or even just talking about things? How your phone suddenly shows up things, you know, that you were talking about.
CHRISY:Who wants to help you out? You're obviously curious and it wants to assist. So uh Nick, did you find anything? Giving him permission.
KERRY:He's like, oh yeah.
CHRISY:There is. Oh no. Oh no. So talk about dysfunction. There is an adult toy advent calendar.
Speaker:Put your phone down there. There's several.
CHRISY:Several.
DJ NICK:Well, there is something for everyone. There's on this one website, but I don't want to give you a chance to do that.
KERRY:No, we're not giving. No, no.
CHRISY:We like to promote very good things. And obviously, everybody has uh the capability you just do whatever you want on your own time.
KERRY:So, all right, so we talked about our shopping and our gift ideas and things like that. What about holiday baking? Have you baked your cookies yet? Are you going to bake cookies? Yeah, you got to. Well, you do because you got kids.
CHRISY:You got it with kids, and it's lovely to kind of do it with them and it's fun. I used to be so much better at this, and there are certain people who every year pull it off. They have a schedule. I knew one person, they took like one day off, probably like right after Thanksgiving. It was a whole day of just cooking and doing their baking, and then it was fro, you know, they would freeze it and they had it ready to go.
KERRY:My sister is amen to this. She's so good about it. She she's good at planning. Yes. And and so I'm always when I go over there, especially this time of year, I'll be like, Do you have any cookies? And so, like, re because she knows which ones my favorites are, but then sho she actually has them pre-packaged. Like, she'll bake all these cookies and then get an assortment and put it in a bag and freeze it. So you just have to take the bag, and there you go. You've got a whole cookie tray. Nice. Yeah. So she usually sends me home with that, which I appreciate because especially this year, because as I mentioned, I packed up my kitchen. There's no baking going on.
CHRISY:You're gonna torture yourself with decorating, but you're not gonna torture yourself with baking. See, you're gonna be. I'm torturing myself by not having the things do bake right now.
KERRY:But everybody's giving you stuff. Well, then that's not torture. It's torture when they give me things like I have to take the whole bag that has all the stuff in it that I don't want, but it does have like the apricot cookies that I like are in there, and it's like when they give you the snowballs.
CHRISY:I hate the snowballs.
KERRY:I don't like the snowballs either.
CHRISY:No, come at me with that powdered sugar ball of dough. Fry the my mom always would bring up that she needed to make these. I think she didn't call them snowballs, they were something else. Yeah, they do have another name. And this is like, really? No, we don't need to make these. It's like, but she's like made them all the time. It's like, oh my god. So I did use her. I love oh my well, good ones. Good ones, right? Yeah. Yeah. A nice, lovely lady that Nick knows uh makes them, and she gives, I'm like, man, I wish, does she need me to buy? I will buy them. They are that good. They are really light and thin. I mean, she is an expert pizza maker if she can make them that thin. The lady that you know you brought it up. They're and they taste so they're so good, and they are so light. Yeah, I do like pit cells. I do, and I don't feel guilty eating those.
KERRY:No, I like them as long as they're good, you know. But there's a very the good ones are in a very small window compared to the bad ones. So I'm very picky about them. Right. Yeah.
CHRISY:What I used to do, I did try for one year when I was really on my game. I do remember maybe it was more than one. Year I did this where like I had like a five-day period where I baked two cookies a day. Oh wow, which were committed. Well, it was, but it wasn't two cookies, is manageable for a day. And you at the end you had ten different cookies. Yes. Which is I think a really great variety for holiday. Yeah. But now I'm usually just struggling on one day to make three different kinds, and my husband reminds me it's not anything we should really have in the house. He says that when I'm making the cookies I like. So I'll make like these special that I disconnect with Christmas. Right. That I should have these cookies. Right. And he's like, you know, we really don't need all this crap in the house. But when I make chocolate chip. Oh, game on. Oh, you didn't make enough. Why didn't you only make why'd you only make five dozen chocolate chip? Why isn't there nothing?
KERRY:Sitting there with the silliest little trying to be innocent grin on his face.
CHRISY:And to me, for the longest time, I did not make chocolate chip at Christmas.
KERRY:Because to me, that isn't that's not a Christmas cookie. It's an anytime cookie. Yes. Right. Why should I make a cookie? So now it's become a Christmas cookie because they're not any other time cookies.
CHRISY:It's usually the first cookie I make now.
KERRY:And I shouldn't complain because it's a nice, easy cookie to make.
CHRISY:And everybody will eat a chocolate chip cookie. There's not anybody going, what the hell is that? Yeah. Oh, that's Jim's favorite by far, chocolate chip cookie. So, yeah, the baking. Do you have one specific cookie? Like when your sister does make the cookie. You said app that has apricots.
KERRY:We have this family recipe. I mean, I've seen it at other places, but it's was big in our family where it's it's like a sugar cookie that has like an apricot filling. My sister's really perfected it. Like, oh, her sugar cookies, oh god, are just so good, anyways. So, but the whole package of it. Like, I that could be the only cookie I eat, and I'd be totally happy.
CHRISY:I have a recipe which you would probably love. I should make them just for you. I used to make them at Christmas. It was a filly cream cheese apricot thumb print. So the cookie is like a good one. I love a good thumbprint. It was like the cookie part was made with like a cream cheese dough, which was really good and moist and soft. And then you did the apricot preserves as the yeah, I like that. That would probably be my I haven't made it in a while, but it was always a good cookie. It always came out good.
KERRY:Yeah, I love a good thumbprint cookie, all that butter.
CHRISY:Yum, yum, yum. So the Reese, the the peanut butter cookies with the Hershey Kiss. Oh my god, that's like you can't go wrong with that. You don't like that? I don't. Wow.
KERRY:Even Nicolita in general, he doesn't like peanut butter, but he will. I like peanut butter. I just don't care for peanut butter and cookies. Really? Yeah.
DJ NICK:Oh my gosh. I'm not real big on peanut butter and chocolate together. And you're like, Okay. Like I won't.
CHRISY:Did you just hear what he said, everybody? Yeah. Did you ever hear anyone in your life ever say that they're not a fan? But yet, his mom used to make buckeyes. Oh no. Oh, give me a good buckeye. Oh. And he goes and his sister still makes them and will make sure to give him some. So how can you dare say that you're not a fan of peanut butter and chocolate?
DJ NICK:I like Reese cups. I don't like Reese cups that much. Well, whatever.
CHRISY:Reese cups are not what they used to do. For some reason they're not.
DJ NICK:They're not the same as the buckeyes are. I like the buckeyes better than although I don't eat those. The Hershey Kiss peanut butter blossoms or whatever they call them.
KERRY:I just I just went and got there's this one uh Amish farm market by us, and they make the best no bake cookies. And so we uh we we were really depressed the one day. So Jim and I were like we were emotional eating, so we went and bought some while they had buckeye cookies, so I was like all excited. I got them home. Oh, they were horrible. Oh my god, they were really oh they were horrible. That's the worst. I know I couldn't believe it. I was like, oh my god, what is this? So then I had to go to a different market because I knew they had good ones because I was like, I can't have that be like the like my last taste of buckeye, like no. So I had to go and oh, they were so good. I think I ate the whole thing myself. Wow container. Oh if they're good, you gotta go for it. And I kept saying to myself, it's peanut butter, it's protein, it's okay. That's right.
CHRISY:So traditionally, though, if you touch on some cookies, because people have their staples that they make in their family. So pizzells are wonderful. I don't have a pizzel iron. I I should maybe buy one, but I generally just want somebody to give me a big thing of them.
KERRY:Yeah, I'm the same way with buckeyes too. As much as I love them, I won't make them. That's way too much work.
CHRISY:Oh, they are a lot of work. That is a lot of work. I have alienated a lot of the people though that would generally make the pizzels. So I'm really not getting them anymore because I'm not. That doesn't surprise me. So I might need to either buy some or really get buddy buddy with this lady that Nick knows that gave me. Those were really good. There you go. Score me a couple too.
KERRY:If I find some good buccas, I'm gonna and but kolachi was always a big thing. Oh, the church, the ladies at our church make kolachi. Oh my god, it's so good. So I've ordered a bunch of those.
CHRISY:Every year I would make it, but it would just never made it. Yeah, my mom's recipe, and it's a really good recipe, and it tastes wonderful. But my favorite thing is not to get the nut kalachi, the nutless kalachi. Well, there's apricot kolachi, nut kalachi. My mom used to make one that had it was cheese and white raisins, and you made it with like ricotta or cottage cheese. It was actually really good. It was good. It was good, but I like the one where they mix, they do apricot with nut. So it's apricot nut. Yeah. And it's really good. I hate to say it, not a sponsor, and I give a shout-out to a place over by us. Yeah. But when I go into town, they have a factory uh over there in Austin Town now, not very close to where you used to live. Okay. On Victoria Road. Buttermaid bakery. Oh, buttermade. Yeah, they may they have good stuff. In fact, there's uh friends of ours that live here with us, and they're from Pittsburgh area originally. Yeah. But they've lived in Worcester for quite a while. They, when they can go that way, if they're heading to see family in Pittsburgh or whatever, they stop and get they love the the nut roll, the calachie. And it is good there. I have to give them props. That nut that's tastes as close as you can get to my mother's home.
KERRY:Yeah, it's gotta be good though, because like I don't like the dry. The bread of it can't be dry.
CHRISY:Well, theirs is not. Yeah, that's good. It's expensive too. Oh yeah, they usually wouldn't how much are they a roll now?
DJ NICK:There are like they're almost 20 bucks. No, they're more than that. They're more than twenty dollars?
CHRISY:Or like twenty-one, twenty-two bucks or I I don't get out of there with like not dropping close to if not a hundred dollars. Well, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So, but hey, you know what? If it's worth it, if it's if it's good it's harder has a nut allergy. So now I'm afraid if I she won't, she knows not to eat them already. But I just take your older one or younger one? Older. Oh, yeah, okay. The oldest has uh tree nuts. Tree nuts, okay, which we just realized. So but oh god, yeah. The buckeyes, the kalachi, yummy, yummy pincels. I do meringue. Uh I like to do make the meringue ones because they're just again, it's just a me thing. Nobody else touches them. And you work so hard to get that meringue right. Um, and you have to stick them in the oven with the door open because you can't expose it to too much heat. Oh, they'll brown. Yeah, so you just sort of put them in a warm oven and that's how they kind of set or whatever. Again, sounds like a lot of work. It is, but they're really good. So are you into any holiday crafts? Uh no. I mean, but I guess I am because you have to be now because I I need my pool. You need your pool. Yep. Am I fake uh flowers and stabbing and sticking them in my doorway and saying, Look what I created. I've seen people take their old pumpkins and turn them into snowmen on social media.
KERRY:Oh yeah, and by the way, what's up with your neighbor still having the Halloween pumpkins on their porch? Who has the neighbor with the nice house and the nice colors?
Speaker 5:We actually have ours out too.
KERRY:Oh, I was too distracted by the neighbors still having you know jack-o'-lanterns on their porch. It wasn't just fall, but it's jack-o'-lanterns. I'm like, hello. Well, they just didn't get rid of them. But I'm sure they will. Chop chop, get that HOA on them. No, you know what?
DJ NICK:Hey, you know what we're coming after us too, then, because we got a couple pumpkins still on our yeah, but are they carved?
KERRY:No, they're just pumpkins. Okay, that's fall. So I can I can a little bit get away from get away with that. But this is jack-o'-lanterns that they got on their porch.
CHRISY:Well, maybe they just really liked them. You ever see the animals that eat these things and then they get drunk because the pumpkin ferments, and then the squirrel like falls out of the tree all of a sudden? There's a dead squirrel in the yard. It fell out of the tree because it ate the rotten pumpkin.
KERRY:Oh no, I did not see that. I mean, I know I've I've been watching the news about the uh iguana alerts in Florida. Did you see about that? No, because of the cold weather spell that Florida was having. So, you know how we have like tornado watch, tornado warnings, you know, the different, like meaning that, you know, if you have a tornado watch, conditions are favorable. You might have a tornado and a tornado warning means that there's like gonna be a tornado. There's a tornado somewhere. Right. So in Florida a couple weeks ago, they had because of this cold snap that went through, they had iguana, falling iguana watch and falling iguana warnings because the temperature would get so cold that the iguanas that you know naturally live, you know, there, they would it it their uh their body temperature would get so low they'd go catatonic and then they'd fall out of the trees.
CHRISY:Iguana are in trees in trees.
KERRY:Yes, iguanas are in trees. So they sliver up the trees. They just climb, you know, like a lizard.
CHRISY:Anyways, because of the trees. I love Florida. I love you people in Florida who are listening. Uh God bless with the iguanas and duck and cover, baby.
KERRY:I just thought it was funny that you know, like I'm like a falling iguana water, and they added on the news, like on the screen. Anyways, I don't know how we digress.
CHRISY:I would be the one that would get hit with I got shit on in a parking lot once from a seagull at Hills. At hills. I knew it was gonna happen. They were going crazy, you know, because they would people would throw popcorn and all the other crap they got at hills out in the parking lot. There's seagulls everywhere, and there's no water anywhere. Why are they here? But and then they're flying and they're swarming. And I yelled at Nick too. I mean, this is like 30 years out. Like, hurry up and get the car open. I'm gonna get you're gonna get as soon as she said shit down my damn arm. I was like, God damn it. And uh of course, I threw that coat away. See, I you wanted me to get rid of shit stuff uh if a bird craps on him. Nick, you want me to bring my bird over and let it fly around your basement here? That would be an awful lot of work to get me to get rid of it, but it would do it. It would do it.
Speaker:Oh, that's funny.
CHRISY:It's uh yeah. Uh decorating crafts. I mean, yeah, but by the time this we're at now, you kind of want to make sure, yeah, especially because social media tells us we should have had this done months ago. Right, you're too late now. Oh, and today now you should be doing how Easter stuff. Well, yeah.
KERRY:Never allowed to enjoy the holiday we're in. Oh my. Oh, this was fun. Well, we uh definitely enjoyed today. This was definitely a good topic to talk about this time of year. But don't forget, in the month of December, we are supporting the Akron Canton Regional Food Bank as well as supporting any other food bank and food uh distribution across the United States or worldwide, but especially this one. They do a lot of wonderful work providing food for uh many different counties in our area. You can learn more about them at our website, dysfunctionjunkiespodcast.com. And uh definitely check us out too on there. We've got lots of interesting things on our website from our blog. You can see all our episodes on there. We also have on there our reach map, so you can see if your uh city or state has shown up on our map. And yeah, so that's what we got going on there. Well, get cooking people. Yes, baking those cookies, get cook and and uh start shipping those gifts. Oh, yeah. All right, all right. Well, happy holidays, everybody. We'll be at you next week. Bye, everybody. Bye bye.
