Friendships, Reason Or Lifetime

Ever wonder why some friends fade while others feel like home? We break down reason, season, and lifetime friendships—and how your circle shapes your life. Listen now and audit your friend group with us. Who’s your root friend?

#besties #friends #bff #reasonseasonlifetime #yourtribe #mypeeps

Chapters

• 0:00 Setting The Friendship Stage
• 1:28 Quality Over Quantity In Adulthood
• 2:56 Old Friends You Pick Up With
• 6:17 Neighborhood Circles And Opting Out
• 9:58 Reason, Season, Or Lifetime
• 13:25 Early Friendships And Bullying
• 19:10 School Years: Shifting Alliances
• 24:33 Growing Up, Partying, And Consequences
• 28:05 Marriage, Neighbors, And Low-Pressure Bonds
• 31:25 You Are Who You Hang With

Transcript

SPEAKER_01: 0:07

Welcome to the Dysfunction Junkies Podcast. We may not have seen it all, but we've seen enough. And now, here are your hosts, Chrissy and Carrie.

KERRY: 0:21

Hello, Junkies. I'm Carrie. And I'm Chrissy. We get to talk about the wonderful subject of friendship today. I'm so excited.

CHRISY: 0:30

All right. Well, it's important for you and I, and important to a lot of people, I guess.

KERRY: 0:36

Yeah, because our friendships in our friend circles really does affect our lives, whether it's a functional friendship, a dysfunctional friendship, or anything in between. Right.

CHRISY: 0:49

I think a lot of them are probably dysfunctional. And maybe you guys out there with your friends don't realize it, but it probably is.

KERRY: 0:57

And that's probably why they're so great. Because we can be dysfunctional with each other.

CHRISY: 1:01

Yeah. You can be dysfunctional and do dysfunctional things together, which is fun. I don't know. Friendships can be, I don't know. They can just be. I mean, I have some people who friends outside of just you and I. Yeah. But as you get older, and we'll talk about it more, you really just I think with everything in life as you get older, you really want quality over anything else.

KERRY: 1:28

Yes. You know, it's funny that this is the topic for that we're we're discussing today because Jim and I just went to dinner the other night with a couple that we have been friends with, and me specifically. So her name is Kelly, and we went out to dinner with her, and Kelly and I have been friends since I was 15 years old. And how come I don't know Kelly? Oh, you know. Do I know Kelly?

CHRISY: 1:52

You know Kelly. But I don't think I've ever met a Kelly. Uh I maybe I know of her, but I don't I've never met her. Is that the story?

KERRY: 1:59

You might, but I'm you you do know who I'm I have a feeling I do.

CHRISY: 2:04

Okay.

KERRY: 2:04

Hi, Kelly. So Kelly and I have been friends since I was like 15. And it it's one of those friendships that we don't see each other a lot. We don't talk a lot. We don't even text a lot. I mean, there's been literally times where it's been years before we've talked to each other again. But it's one of those awesome friendships that you just pick up right where you left off. And even though you may not be involved in each other's daily lives, you know, especially now with Facebook and everything, you kind of get, you know, you kind of know what's going on. You, you know, even if you don't talk. But we were out to dinner with her and her husband, and literally it was like almost four hours that went by. We're like, I we could have sat and talked for another three or four. So I get what you mean by quality. And for me, I think for me, friendships have always been that way. I have my core quality friends, and that is I'm I'm good with that. I don't need the the bunches, you know.

SPEAKER_00: 3:04

Right.

KERRY: 3:04

I was never one of those kids in high school that had the the big click of friends, you know, the big group, the entourage. That's too much work. It is a lot of work.

SPEAKER_02: 3:14

I think that's kind of how you guys were up until the time you got to to together to do this podcast. You you guys will go a few years apart without, you know, and it was not never anything about hard feelings, right? You guys just life, life happening. Life happening, yeah. But that's kind of like similar to your guys' relationship up to the point where you guys started the podcast. Yeah. Now you guys have to spend more time together.

CHRISY: 3:40

It's been fine. It was mandatory friendship. Well, I remember this is funny. Again, it usually speaks volumes of me before we moved here. Uh we lived in a neighborhood where there was just a lot of people all around our age. I mean, everybody was pretty much the same age. You did. And uh they were very close with each other. They had all gone to a lot, most of them had gone to the high school in that town that we lived in. And we were from uh nearby but not from there. We didn't go to their school. Right. So they all knew each other, they were all about the same age, their kids were all about the same age. I mean, uh our situation was we we weren't from that town, uh, but not far. Uh we didn't go to the schools they went to. Right. And we waited to have kids. So it was a lot, but they would get together a lot and they would sort of congregate on their driveways with a fire pit. And it it was just it happened a lot. And he'd be they had a fire pit on their driveway.

SPEAKER_02: 4:47

Oh, it was quintessential suburbia.

CHRISY: 4:49

I mean, yeah, I mean, and I remember sometimes, you know, we would drive by. Well, we were invited once in a while to the fire pit, you know, and generally I would send Nick to the fire pit. I'd stay home, you know, man the house. You send him to do the reconnaissance work. Yeah. Well, because I probably some part of me, it's a little painful to just make sense to talk chit-chat. Yeah, I'm not good with that, you know, unless you want to get into something heavy and deep, or you, you know, a a movie I'm gonna reference. It's difficult for me to like relate. But I drove would drive by and I'd say, boy, that look at all they just seem so nice. It seems nice. Look at all that. But then I would sit there and I would think, and I was like, you know what? No, that looks like a goddamn nightmare. You got a lot of people, you had to flip and find out if they were showing up. Now you gotta listen to this many people tell you their bullshit stories. I mean, it looked like a headache, and I had come to the conclusion that, yeah, at first I thought, oh, yeah, this looks great, but then I was like, no, it's just not it's not for me. Yeah, yeah.

KERRY: 5:58

I've definitely been one that's always been a believer of that saying that you have people in your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime.

CHRISY: 6:05

And I thought what the hell you've never heard that? No, that's awesome. You've never heard get out of here. No, it wasn't in the movie. I didn't hear it. It wasn't in the movie. The ready movie. It wasn't like a gone with the wind saying, somebody. No, yeah, a reason, a season, or a lifetime. That tells me that there are statements out there that are good without being in film. Okay, I got you. Yeah.

KERRY: 6:33

One or two. Just one or two. Right. I definitely have felt that way. You know, I look back at different relationships and friendships over the years, and there's definitely been those that have been a reason. And, you know, they're very short. They, they, they, they're, they're, they come in, they do their job, they leave, it's great. And then you just kind of never see or hear from them again. But they were there for a specific reason. Right. Then you have the seasonal ones, and some seasons last longer than others, and I've definitely had my share of those. But then for me, the most important ones are those lifetime ones. And that's where I that's where I have my my core group. You know, it's Kelly, it's you, it's Heather, it's Dawn and Karen, and it just like that's my core. That's my lifetime core. Yeah, that's that's really the ones I care about. And those are the ones, like I said earlier, you can go a long time without talking or just sending an emoji or a thumbs up, and you know, and they're also the ones that out of the blue on your darkest days, you suddenly get a text message from them that says, Hey, you were on my mind today, you know, and it's always whenever you were having a really bad day or just really needed uh someone to touch base, and and they felt that they felt that energy and they reached out to you.

CHRISY: 7:48

So yeah, no, those are definitely I like the reason season lifetime. That's awesome. Kind of when I was researching this, I went back to about your research. Yeah, my research is so detailed.

KERRY: 8:01

In the beginning, when Adam and Eve were in the garden, who was their friend?

CHRISY: 8:05

So I just looked at like when we were really little, like I had a couple of friends when I was like four years old, neighborhood girls that I was friends with. Uh-huh. And when you're that little, they were both like a little older than me. So you kind of just latched on to them and they probably hung out with you, even though when you're four, they're like six or whatever. It's not like they're doing things that are that much different than what you're doing. Right. But there's still a little bit of age difference. So you kind of latch on to these people. And as we discussed in that one show that we did, where we talked about the dysfunction of like having some friends in the neighborhood, your neighbors. Yeah. And the family you didn't get to choose. It's like family, you don't choose them. Yeah. They're just they're there, and that's who you're friends with. You're forced to live around. Whether you like them or you don't like them. But so I had a couple of friends like that, and they were older. And but I remember the one that was like friendly with me. She she was real spoiled, believe it or not, more than me, if that's possible. Oh yeah. No, way more spoiled than me. And if you just she had two TVs in her room. No, no, she was just she was always had the best clothes, and it she just was had a lot of attention from her mom and her grandparents. Her parents were divorced, and she lived with her mom at her grandparents' house. So I remember when she would want to see something, like if I got like a new toy or something, yeah, and she wanted to see it. And sometimes when you're a kid, you don't I I don't want you to touch my toy. Don't touch my new toy. Right. And I remember she would say this line, it's still in my head. It's like, if you don't let me see it, I'll go home. And when you're little, that's like, oh, you're gonna leave now. So then you have to give in.

KERRY: 9:50

She blackmailed you with her presence.

CHRISY: 9:53

Yeah, and it was that same tone all the time. I'll go home. I swear, I'm not even exaggerating. That's like how it sounded. And you're like, oh, okay, okay, okay. And she was also the type of friend that, and I think when you're little like that too, maybe you've had this experience. You can really only function at level with two people. Once you introduce a third party into that, it turns into two against one in some way. Yeah. And it's just two gang up on the one, and I was always the one that kind of got ganged up. I didn't usually no way. No, I really was. Yeah. Well, in this scenario, because she was a little older. Yeah. So her friends were a little older. And what are you looking at?

SPEAKER_02: 10:38

I I don't want to come off sexist. This always seems to be like more of a girl thing to me when there's a third. Because that was never my experience with boys.

CHRISY: 10:47

Well, yeah, it's possible, but maybe you just didn't have that kind of dynamics going on.

KERRY: 10:52

I do think there's some truth in that. I don't mean to be sexist. I could be in a group of friends that were guys in multiples, and it was fine. But yeah, as soon as you have a second girl in there, yeah, I could see where that happens. I I I think that's that could be on the true side. Yeah.

CHRISY: 11:10

Well, I just and it was always a nightmare. And then and then I don't even know how you come back to them after that because sometimes it could get vicious.

KERRY: 11:18

I was so, so much bullied, and I we mentioned about this before too. I was bullied so much as a kid that, you know, sometimes I look back and go, was I really their friend, or was I just their comedy point for the day, or they're, you know, like they kept me around, but they they abused me, you know what I mean? And and I didn't have a lot of choices, so you know, I either sucked it up or I was delusional in thinking that they some of them actually were friends, but they probably were like well again when you're especially when you're really young, yeah.

CHRISY: 11:50

The the choices are very yeah. First of all, where are you going? Exactly. You can't get anywhere, you're totally stuck in the neighborhood with these rotten kids, and then you know, you kind of just want to have a good time and do kid things. Right. So your I guess level of willingness to but see that's where you and I difference though, because you had kids in your neighborhood.

KERRY: 12:13

I did it. I had senior citizens and dead people. Those are probably the better choice, aren't they? At that point. I mean, seriously, we had a ghost in the house and we had two cemeteries on the street I lived in. And other than that, it was you know, it wasn't until I was old enough to ride a bike and and had a horse that I went around the corner up the street a half a mile that I found kids.

CHRISY: 12:39

My friends were Well, when would you say how old were you when you felt like you had a buddy? Like I wouldn't, you don't have to say best friend, but like you buddied around with somebody on a regular basis. How old were you?

KERRY: 12:50

So I had a good friend in like third through sixth grade.

CHRISY: 12:55

And then prior to that though, you don't have like little friends that you remember?

KERRY: 12:58

No, because there wasn't any.

CHRISY: 13:01

But even like mom or dad's buddies or friends that they hang out with, they had kids your age, or no, because remember, like you, my parents were older.

KERRY: 13:11

I had siblings that were older, but then I came around eight years later. So I think like you mentioned before with your parents, that time had passed. So they are your parents' friends, their kids were already kind of grown up. Right. So, and then my parents didn't have friends that they hung out with.

CHRISY: 13:29

Yeah.

KERRY: 13:29

So I was the I was forced. So where my neighborhood where you had the neighborhood kids, I had the kids in the classroom. You know what I mean? I didn't have kids in the neighborhood hang out. I only had the friends were my friends at grade school that I was forced to hang out with because they were in my same class. So you had a friend then you're saying so if yeah, from third to third or sixth grade, I had a friend and we were pretty good friends, but you know, I definitely was, you know, she was the popular one and I was just the tag along. Then we had tryouts for cheerleading and I made it and she did it. Oh boy, and that ended the friendship. Aw. So because she couldn't take that she wasn't she didn't she didn't get it, and she was the popular one, the pretty one, you know. So then I had a different friend for seventh and eighth grade, and then when we went to high school, we went to different grades or high schools, so then that ended up, and then then me and you.

CHRISY: 14:19

Right. Well, school friends prior to high school and you and I were really, especially in grade school, total just the kids are fickle. Yes, yes. I remember basically having a new best friend every year, and then like the next year, it's such a weird dynamic because then it felt like the next year, it's almost like you didn't even know each other. Yeah, yeah. And and the person you hated the year before was now your your BFF. Yeah, it was just, you know, and sometimes I sit back and I wonder what happened to some of these people, you know. I mean, they went to grade school with you. Yeah. Now, some of the kids that we went to grade, I went to grade school with, and probably the same for you, ended up going to high school with. Yeah. You know, a lot of them dropped off because the majority, at least from my perspective, even though I went to Catholic grade school, yeah, there were three years I spent in the public school system. So I didn't see a lot of kids. There was probably a handful that I remembered from grade school that went on to our Catholic high school. Yeah. So yeah, grade school friends is just crap. In my that was my experience. Yep. I didn't think it was that great. And no until you and I, and then we had a good time. Now, the girl that used to say, I'll go home, I did end up picking up a relationship with her again. The all-go home girl. The all-go-home girl. And again, remember, she was older than me. And so, probably like my junior to senior year in high school, and she was already and started college, but she was a partier, and I kind of was doing that sort of on my own, but she took it to another level because she was older, and she probably got me into a lot of trouble that I probably shouldn't have been in at the age I was in. Yeah. But it was amusing, and she had a lot.

KERRY: 16:01

She really does like to be entertained. I do.

CHRISY: 16:05

I do appreciate a big old train wreck happening in front of me. Oh, I thought that's why you married me. Because I would entertain you. You do entertain me. I appreciate that. But unfortunately, this friend, uh her fun, you need to have fun, was deeper than I realized. Yeah. You don't notice that. And uh, she had a problem the rest of her life and she ended up passing away. Oh. Which is sad, and it kind of bothers you because you remember being little with these people, and then you know, they're kind of you just don't realize how much they maybe struggle. Now, when I was talking about me being sort of I wouldn't, I guess it was kind of bullying when I was little in the neighborhood kids, and you get the third party in there and then they team up on you. As I got older, and some of the kids in the neighborhood were younger now, so then I became the older one. And you became the bully. I did kind of, yeah. And especially for fingers, you know, Natalie, you know. Took a beating. Yeah, she did. She did. Yeah. But to be honest, out of all those neighborhood kids, I generally they were just there.

KERRY: 17:11

Yeah.

CHRISY: 17:12

I did genuinely like Natalie. Yeah. And I'm glad that I could still reach out to her, and we do go back and forth. Yeah. So I do appreciate that. So, Natalie, if you're listening, yes, I did really, really like you. Yes, I pulled your fingernail and made you break your fingernail off your hand and sprain your thumb and embarrass uh you sometimes because I was loud and obnoxious. And but uh yeah, no, I did like Natalie.

KERRY: 17:36

I don't know how I I was able to manage to I you never did those things to me. Like, I don't know why, what was different that you never subjected me to your abuse other than forcing me to watch horror movies.

CHRISY: 17:50

Well, by the time I went to junior high, I had some friends in junior high, and junior high was just like and and the freshman year in high school was just an endeavor and immaturity and ridiculous. Like I said, we were sitting in the cafeteria, me and a group of girls reading the Thornbirds book, but all the dirty parts and laughing and just being obnoxious. And then I, you know, my one girlfriend, we read such a horrible part that was so juicy, she lost her mind. She spit chocolate milk everywhere.

KERRY: 18:25

I mean, so between the movie getting you in trouble with the nuns and the book.

CHRISY: 18:34

Hey, it was a sign of our uh times, I guess. But by the time I got to high school, and because I had come into school, a new school, not being there at the beginning, like everybody else, yeah, there is a level where you you kind of know your place where you need to just sit down and shut up and be quiet. Don't come in guns blaring, yeah, because people are gonna come at you. Yes. I mean, even being quiet and shy, you still I took some shit because some people thought I was a friend. But you see, you don't know, but you probably remember me now. You're not remembering me then. I remember you then. Well, with you, I was comfortable.

KERRY: 19:17

Stealthy. I wouldn't say you were quiet and shy. I would say you were stealthy. I don't know. Like you weren't you just knew you knew how to, like you said, you knew how to be in your place. I tried, yes, but you were stealthy. Anyways, go ahead. I'm sorry.

CHRISY: 19:33

Well, no, that's okay. Yeah, our friendship is good. Now, uh going uh beyond that, now that we're older, yes, well, then you you you know you end up getting married, and you're friends with your spouse. Yes. And I probably rely heavily on him more than other same partners in their relationships do. Yes. But I've noticed probably, and especially since we've moved here, it's taken a little while, but some of the friendships we've developed here, uh especially Especially with people who live in our neighborhood. We have great neighbors uh here. Um, it's nice because we get together, we'll go to lunch, or we'll hang out when the weather permits, and we have a good time and we talk about, you know, yeah just stuff. But again, it's like you're at the point, no, I don't have to be with you every day or know what you did today, or are we gonna go and do this big event? Right. We once in a while you might do something together, but it's not like you have to. The pressure's off. If you're still having pressure to have to entertain friends or be entertained by friends, you're in the wrong certain age, you you've got you're probably miserable in a lot of aspects of your life.

KERRY: 20:37

Yes, yes, I would agree. And you know, that kind of is like along the lines of the reason, the season, the lifetime is there's that phrase that says, You are a reflection of the people you surround yourself with. It's kind of like who you hang out with does affect who you are as a person. So they always say, if you want to better yourself, then you have to better your friend group. You know, if you want to reach this goal, then you need to hang around people that are achieving that goal. So, and I've always found that really good because there's been times in my life whenever things maybe weren't kind of going well, and I really had to sit and look at who was I hanging out with. And inevitably it I had to make a change. I had to, you know, really think about who am I hanging out with because I need to change that, because this is not going well for me. Nope, that's very true.

CHRISY: 21:29

Yeah, and they do affect that. But yeah, so I did do a little bit more research and came up with like some uh if info in the AI, I guess. But they're talking about this is kind of interesting. When you're a child and you're an adolescence, you have like two sets of friends, which I think this could apply for everybody activity friends and identity friends.

KERRY: 21:53

Oh, that's a good way of porting it. That's very true.

CHRISY: 21:56

And, you know, so uh you have shared interests like sports and games, right? And you know, things that are common in childhood that you get along with and talk about. And then your identity friends, you actually, you know, it's crucial for exploring your identity, belonging, and emotional support.

KERRY: 22:16

I think that's what I would call your soul connections. You know, like you said, your activity friends, you know, who you hang out with because of whatever you're involved with. So you don't always have a choice on those people. No, but your identity friends, those are your people that connect to your soul, connect to your energy. Yeah, that those would be your potential lifelong friends.

CHRISY: 22:38

Yeah, they have like all kinds of titles for different types of friends. I never really realized this is a thing, but acquaintance, yes, leaf friends, L-E-A-F friends, casual temporary present for a specific phase or need. A season. Like a passerby or friend of convenience. Right. They're a season. There you go. They're a seasonal friend of the game. Okay, there's three here, and your thing is a three. Three-step, three-step. That's interesting. Maintenance friends, branch friends, stronger connections, requiring occasional upkeep, cards, calls, but may not withstand major life changes.

KERRY: 23:14

Oh, definitely have had those in my life. And then you have to lost a friend because oh my god, I got diagnosed with lupus, and it wasn't convenient to her that I had lupus. Oh, geez. Sorry to put you out with my problem. Sorry, I couldn't come and have dinner with you because I was on a boat ride in the sun and it flupus my flared my lupus, so I had to cancel dinner, and oh my god, that was the death of a long 20-year friendship. Oh my god.

CHRISY: 23:42

Uh-huh. That's pretty bad. Uh-huh. And then there's close root friends, deep, uh, foundational bonds providing unwavering support through life's toughest moments. Lifetime. Like family and other authentic. Um, whatever.

KERRY: 23:57

Whatever. I can't read all the things. That's Chrissy's reading for you. That's me. This is why she can't doesn't like to read. Yeah, I don't like to read. And I graduated.

CHRISY: 24:05

Three words in is like what? I have a degree in literature, but I'm always like, uh, this is I'm already exhausted with the sentence. I'm done. Four words in. So I guess you could see after we go through all of this how these can be turned into, I mean, dysfunction. Oh, there's completely, completely.

KERRY: 24:20

I mean, there's times you're you're a really good friend. You should be able to be the most dysfunctional person you are, and they're gonna be with you. They're gonna support you, they're gonna tell you, hey, you need to pull up your big girl pants, or they're gonna tell you how it is, and you know, but you're still gonna be friends, and yeah, they're just they're the ones that are always there for you, the good, bad, or the indifferent.

CHRISY: 24:44

You want to hear a bad nightmare of a thing I had to deal with? It wasn't really a friend of mine. So when we we were living here Was it an acquaintance? It was sort of it was acquaintance, I guess. We had a common thing going on with this other couple, and we became friendly with them, and we went to dinner, and we're sitting there talking about stuff, and I probably referenced a TV show or movie, as you know I'm prone to do.

KERRY: 25:10

Really?

CHRISY: 25:11

And the lady said to me, Well, I she did it, it was a very common reference. It was so pop culture. It's like you would have to have been like in a hut or a cave or a rock to not understand what I just said. And I was trying to explain, I'm like, Didn't didn't you watch this? How did you not watch this? We're the same age. I don't understand. She's like, Well, we we didn't watch TV really. We in fact, she didn't even say we didn't watch a lot of TV. I think she said we don't want we didn't want we didn't watch TV. Yeah. I I was spent for the day, I couldn't handle it. And I knew right away. You could never be friends with that person. I was like, there's just no way this is gonna work. I'm like, you go with the guy when you can. Uh the woman part ain't gonna happen. I'll do when I have to. But for me to spill out something so common and a reference to pop culture, and you don't get it, and then you have the nerve to tell me why, because you didn't watch, period. Do you know that there is this thing called television that we watch that puts shows on? I I it was so I'm still devastated over it. I know the look on your face, right now. You're still trying to- I can't fathom it. I mean, geez a man.

KERRY: 26:31

So this is gonna really probably blow your mind. You know what we well, maybe it won't. We in the process of this move, we have cut cut ties with the cable and the the satellite TV, you know, not to name any brand names, but so now we only have, you know the apps or the, you know, and so I was thinking about you. I was like, I wonder, does Chrissy have do you have satellite or cable or do you just do all apps?

CHRISY: 26:55

I actually we talk about this all the time because he's always trying to, you know, cut our our budget a little bit with all these things that you subscribe to, Netflix and all these other ones. And I have actually gotten to the point because I like I watch YouTube, so I'm at just that that's the only app I mean most of my time is spent just watching that. Yeah, I mean I enjoy some things on Hulu or Netflix, it's nice to have it, yeah, but I don't totally rely on it, and I think that if you took it away, I wouldn't miss it so much as long as I still had YouTube. Yeah, that's true.

SPEAKER_02: 27:26

So yeah, no, we have a streaming service that's live TV. Okay. So yeah, but you know, it it's they're getting as expensive as the cable.

KERRY: 27:35

Well, we that's why we have satellites we cut it, yeah.

SPEAKER_02: 27:38

And we don't live close enough to any of the metros to really pull it in without investing in a antenna. Right. You know, you can't I can't just buy rabbit ears and pick up Cleveland or Yankestown or Columbus. Right. Because that's kind of the three cities that we're just far enough. You're just far enough in that we can't pick up them with like a rabbit ear stuff. Yeah. So I would I you know, I'm thinking about actually going back old school and investing in an antenna on the top of my room.

CHRISY: 28:07

I this I this sad is they still do that. Oh, yeah, you can still put an antenna in your room. I don't think he's gonna be so disappointed in this because I just don't think that that technology is there. And he's gonna have some obnoxious antenna on my house, Carrie.

SPEAKER_02: 28:22

It's gonna look will your HOA let you have that? Well, it's it can only be so big according to the HOA.

CHRISY: 28:28

There's actually something in their bylaws that talks of an antenna. Boy, I tell you the like a satellite or an antenna can only be so big.

KERRY: 28:37

Yeah. And like in our new that's what she said. Um in our new HOA.

SPEAKER_02: 28:43

No, she didn't say that.

KERRY: 28:45

In our new HOA that we're moving into, there is rules on that too, and like it can't be seen from the road. So, but it doesn't matter because we're we we cut the cord. We're we're we're we went. But I will tell you, we have a a device. This I think I mentioned this before that it's kind of a little um the black box, yeah. The black box that's a little off market, but you could get all the major stuff on it.

SPEAKER_02: 29:11

Can interest can you get networks though, like ABC, C B S and NBC?

KERRY: 29:14

Oh yeah, like you can get them from all over the country. So, like for instance, we have when I was programming ours since we're moving to Utah, but where we're at in Utah is a small town. So, like we I I pulled out so that we we can get the Las Vegas, we can get Salt Lake, like I pulled all these other ones, and there's Youngstown, so we could still watch Youngstown if we wanted to. So yeah, I'll give you the name of the little box.

CHRISY: 29:41

Yeah, you might want to because before anybody out there is thinking that Nick just really wants to be able to get the news and wants to stay informed, I will tell you right now that the reason that this is so important to get stupid rabbit ears or something else is because and it seems like he only worries about this from like August to February. Is that like football season? Yes.

KERRY: 30:07

Oh, oh yeah, you can't this this little device has all kinds of like football games and stuff you can get anywhere. Yeah. Yeah. Back to friendships and not TV. Of course, maybe the TV was your friend's.

CHRISY: 30:20

It was my friend. That was your friend. That was like my first friend ever.

KERRY: 30:24

And it's been my friend the longest. You're not invisible, invisible friend.

CHRISY: 30:31

All my friends are in that box. In the box talking to you. Yes. And I have some of the most prestigious friends there are.

KERRY: 30:41

So I guess the takeaway from today is to kind of look at your friend group. Are they reasons, seasons, or lifetime? Are they a leaf friend? A leaf friend, an identity friend. Are they adding to your dysfunction?

CHRISY: 30:55

Are they bringing their own dysfunction to the table?

KERRY: 31:00

Yeah.

CHRISY: 31:00

So that might be a question you want to ask when you meet people. To what level do you rate your dysfunction? And will you uh impose that dysfunction on me? Because I ain't got time for it. Amen to that. Alrighty.

KERRY: 31:15

Well, before we wrap up today, I do want to remind everyone that this is the month of January and we are supporting Samaritans Purse. This is an international organization that helps provide many different types of aid to people throughout the world. They help in times of emergencies, uh, natural disasters. At Christmas time, they do a shoebox providing toys in um necessary and needed items to children that are us throughout the world. They also provide heart surgeries for children that need special heart surgeries. So they do some amazing things. So I definitely recommend checking them out on our website. Our website is dysfunction junkiespodcast.com. And otherwise, we'll see you next week. Bye, everybody. Bye-bye.